What Thai Women Are Really Like

Last updated: January 24th, 2020 | in Thai Girls

What Thai Women Are Like

Most people discover this site by searching for all sorts of topics related to Thailand on google. But from what I see in my site stats the majority of first time visitors are typing in phrases like “what do thai girls think”, “farang and thai woman” or “sex with thai girl”. And even though I don’t have a specific article to each and every single search phrase out there, a lot of you guys then hit up one of the most read articles on Thailand Redcat: Are Thai Girls all about money?

What I’m basically saying in this piece is that not all Thai girls are about money. While this is just half of the truth and a somewhat general statement as well, what I really meant to say there is: You can have a hell lot of fun here in Thailand and meet and sleep with beautiful Thai women over and over again without paying much money. You might even find your girl paying the bills in the cinema, restaurant or for the taxi back to her place.

That’s especially true if you’re dating women who are around your age or older. You should always be aware that age matters a lot in Thailand and the fact that the words “pîi” (พี่) for older person and “nɔ́ɔng” (น้อง) for younger person always replace the actual name of someone you don’t know yet. It’s not just that the older siblings are the main caretaker in the family both for the parents and also for the younger brothers and sisters – but this also applies to relationships where the man is usually older than the woman.

One side note before we get into the interesting part: Of course we are talking about “normal Thai women” here, means girls with day jobs, office girls and students. If you fall in love with any sort of bar girl, you’re paying 98% of all bills from day one with the exception being the 8 Baht a person for the non-airconditioned bus ticket in Bangkok (supposing she’s cool with hopping on one) and the rare occasions she walks to the 7-Eleven by herself and doesn’t ask you for a couple of notes to get her daily supply of snacks and toiletries.

Anyway, thanks for still reading. Maybe I have lost a few of you guys already after these first paragraphs as I basically made two completely contradictory statements. First I said you can have fun with Thai women for free and then claiming that since age matters a lot in Thai society and men are usually looking for younger women (and vice versa) it’s us guys who pay most of the time. So what the heck do I mean by that? Let me start by saying:

The longer you are dating a Thai woman, the more you take on your role as the caretaker in the relationship.

And yes, by caretaker I mean the financial caretaker in the relationship. It’s really as easy as that. Thai women simply still don’t have the ambition and chance to earn more money than the guys or make career in one of the (very few) big companies. Yes they can earn some good money by working as pretties and hostesses at events and do model jobs here and there or sell beauty products on facebook as long as they’re young and gifted. But they know if they want to keep their current lifestyle they need to find a guy who takes care of them once they passed their 20s.

Maybe a few of you guys now think hey I know some chicks who work as real estate agents and are doing really good. But then ask yourself how many of them are olden then say 35? Yes, there are always exceptions but I bet you don’t know a lot who are over 35 and make more money than their husband, no matter whether Thai or Farang.

In that regards, I would compare the situation in Thailand with the one in western countries some 50 years ago when it was the man who worked full time and the woman taking care of the household and children at home. I tell you this is still the case in my own home in Germany where my dad always supported our family financially while my mom prepared the meals, did the laundry, cleaned up the house and was always around when me or my sister needed her (while still working part time).

Taking Care of your Thai Woman

And yes, this is exactly how it works in Thailand. Some guys ask their Thai women to still take up a job or buy her a small business like a coffee shop to keep her busy while others just want to have her around all the time and give her some pocket money every other day or on a monthly basis which is then called “ngǝn dʉan” (money month, เงินเดือน) and yes that’s exactly the same word as the salary for employees.

If you are ever thinking about marrying a Thai woman then what you should be aware of is that you are not marrying only one person but a whole family and are supposed to take part in all sorts of social gatherings but also the moment you are asking her parents for permission to marry her you need to promise them to take care (in Thai “duu lɛɛ”, ดูแล) of her always. In many cases they even want to have a look at your bank book (or book bank) to check on your savings and regular income.

And there’s more to the marrying part: Ever heard of Sin Sod (sǐn sɔ̀ɔt, สินสอด)? That’s the amount of money you need to pay your future wife’s parents in addition to promising of taking care of her and it’s not uncommon that you’re looking at a 6-figure number here as a form of expressing your gratefulness to the family. Okay, I think we shouldn’t go in too much detail here, the whole marriage topic really deserves its own article.

So now that we’ve talked quite a bit about the money aspect and sure, that’s what most people are interested in anyway but let’s have a look at some other things to find more answers to the initial question what Thai women are really like.

Are Thai Women Doing the First Step?

I remember during my working holiday in Australia and not even planning on visiting Thailand at that time an Irish work colleague told me “man you must go there, you can sit in a bar and the chicks come over talking to you without you doing anything!”. By now I know by bars he meant beer bars and by girls working girls or to be more precise prostitutes since in the regular bars it’s still the man who is supposed to do the first step.

Generally, not always. You can still be flirting (in Thai “jìip”, จีบ) with the girl at the coffee shop without you actually knowing it. It’s just so much more easy to get in touch with the women here in everyday situations than it is back home and yes if she likes you she might also ask you first for your line or facebook contact but if you’re out in the bars and clubs it’s still the men who make the first move.

Do Thai Women Like to Lie?

The headline of this section could more appropriately be called “Why are Thai Women lying so much and easily?”. Because no one really doubts that the girls here like to lie in every other situation, sometimes without even having a reason for it.

Just a few days ago I told my girlfriend “hey, I didn’t know Jum (her friend) is single again. She said her guy had too many giks.” She laughed and said “no, she was just joking, they’re still together. He just picked her up from the shop last evening after work.” Then she explained me that if you have a conversation with a Thai (no matter whether male or female) and it’s not work-related, you can believe like 50% of what she or he says.

Why did she lie about that? I think this is because Thai people like everything that is associated with the verb “to play”: gin lên (eat for fun, snacking), dǝǝn lên (walk for pleasure), nâng lên (hanging out) and in this case the girl was pûut lên (พูดเล่น) – speaking for fun. Doesn’t really make sense does it but I don’t have a more appropriate translation for this term probably because that behavior is just not common in the western world and when someone does just that we would call it lying for no reason.

This article is getting quite long already and I still want to talk about a couple of other points so let’s finish this part with a short list of the most common reasons why Thai girls are lying to Farangs:

  • In order to avoid conflicts (don’t make anyone lose their face)
  • She’s too lazy for a discussion that will arise with telling the truth and thus takes a short cut by lying or also very common just changing the topic
  • Thai Women think that by ignoring a problem it will get solved by itself
  • Your girl thinks you wouldn’t understand as a Farang anyway
  • There is no reason at all

What do Thai Women Think?

That’s a good question. I don’t want to do the mind reader here but one thing is certain: Thai Women think a lot and all the time. Even when dancing in the club or while having sex, most of the time they’re unable of really living in the moment. A few days ago I was lying on the bed with my girlfriend watching an animal series and five seconds after she admired the penguins she was like “oh, I think the work schedule for next week is out” (she works rotating shifts at Chester’s Coffee).

I know this may not sound like the common thought of most westerners that Asians and especially Thai people enjoy their life how it is and don’t worry too much about problems or what might happen in the future, but in my opinion they do think and worry a lot more than we do. The difference is they just don’t talk about it all the time. And if they do then usually it’s their best female friend that they talk about how they really feel instead of their boyfriends.

Are Thai Women Hiding Their Real Face?

This brings us to the final point of this piece. And what I just explained should answer that question quite easily. Yes, it doesn’t take a lot of dates with a Thai girl to sleep with her but it will take a lot more than a few days, weeks or months until she really wants to talk with you as her boyfriend about what she really thinks and feels like.

I wouldn’t even say that’s negative, imagine it is the other way around like with our western women who pour out their heart relatively quickly and tell you all sorts of stuff you don’t even care about when she just wouldn’t “feel ready” to have sex with you for weeks.

I hope by now you have a better understanding of what Thai women are like and if you already knew before, than still thanks for reading all the way through and I guess you also agree with most of my points. Any way, this should be one of the best topics on Thailand Redcat for an open discussion so go down to the comment section and let us know what you think about what I just said. Or maybe you have some additional things to add that I didn’t mention here on the interesting topic of Thai women’s nature and habits.

89 Responses

  • John says:

    What is it with Thai ladies? I have always found them attractive, but am now in a slightly different position to some of the other posts. I met an already married Thai lady same age as me in the Uk about a year ago. She initially told me she was 36 when I told her my age (46 at the time.) She spends a lot of time in the Uk as her husband (who she said she was seperated from but not divorced, is from the Uk) . They live in Thailand, but she comes over on a tourist visa to spend time with the inlaws. We started meeting about 2 months ago when she was back on another trip to Uk. She told me the truth about her age, went into detail about her life. I have become smitten with this woman, but she is also seemingly driven by money. She told me days after we started seeing each other that she wanted to be my girlfriend and after making love she declared her love for me and has spoken about marraige and divorcing her husband, opening up a massage business in the UK under my name but for her to own. My head says stop it now , but my heart says otherwise. Maybe a sign of my own weakness? She knows I don’t have a lot, I am seperated and still am tied in financially to a mortgage and supporting my children, am kind of in a no fixed abode situation. I rattle on…any thoughts?

  • Andy noel says:

    it’s very simple . white man want sex and maby love .thai women want money and family.
    so give thai girlfriend a monthly allowance of 1 or 2 k USD. the trick is keep her in your country on your turf. as long as she sending money home.every month she get sense of purpose. do not live with thai women in thailand she will eat you alive !

  • Judi says:

    My Canadian brother married a Thai girl when he was 60. His first wife. She took him to the cleaners. Farangs beware! I loved Thailand but can’t get past the money grabbers. Do not marry a Thai girl. You will regret it down the road.

    • Stupid Guy says:

      Absolutely correct! I was married to a Thai woman who used me and took everything I had… then when there was nothing left, walked out the door. I was so good to her and her family for the 10 years we were married. What a piece of shit.

  • Tipmonta says:

    I am Thai woman and i have read what foreigner think about Thai women. Most i read say bad things about Thai women, I have to say bad experience of you guys got in Thailand about Thai women because you come here and go to nightlife at bar girls. Maybe you fall in love with bar girls? I know when you love someone you don’t care what she work or her past but how you expect from bar girls? Just make sense! A lot of good Thai women looking for good foreigner because they heartbreak from Thai men, and we believe that foreigner men are honest, love, respect and care more then Thai men. Everywhere in this world have a good and bad people so what i can say just take times to know better, if someone really love you they have to do step by step and time can show you everything. Thai woman can be the best wife ever because we are caring,love and respect our man,, if you lucky enough to find the one.

    Most Thai women not bad. We love our man and always forgive but it seem like they not realize and take for granted… do mistake again and again. It not about ony Thai men, If you are treat women like this not matter how woman love you so much they will finnally move on!

    What i heard also lot from Thai women that get bad experience from foreigner too,, They said foreigner men just want to talk about sex or just want sex with Thai women, This scare Thai women too that hard to find good foreigner man.

    Long distance relationship is difficult but i believe if two people who really want to be together they can wait for each other, that the way to prove. Nowadays true love is rare. i hope you guys lucky.

    • john says:

      First of all, the western farang you see does not represent the western men. It is less than 1 % of 1 %. And this farang is substantially off from normal distribution of population. Just like most Thai man marry with Thai women and raise families, so do the westerners. Keep in mind that the westerners you see in Thai are not the median or average westerners.

      I personally know so many cases of these farangs go east to find women, a lot of cases. My coworkers, friends of friends, etc. I will tell you honestly that most of these guys were from under-privileged social strata in terms of education and discipline. They simply are taking advantage of strong dollar against under-developed countries. So it benefits both way, which is not bad.

      But a lot of them got taken by these clever women from under-developed countries. As soon as they get green card, they will dump old farangs. I even personally warned my close coworkers but he thought that ‘oh, not me’. Another fellow faced the same situation so he hurried to take the bride back to her country to live together. Only way to prevent being dumped by young bride is living in brides’ country.

      There may be cultural difference between the east and west but we are all same human being. Both have the good and bad apples. But the way we love, live and trust is all same whether it is Thailand or America. Do not stereotype as western guys are better than Thais. It all depends on each person.

      Having said that, I am staying in Thailand this summer. I don’t drink, no bad habit and not looking for sex at all. I happened to find a nice old lady and place to stay. Whether she is Thai woman or not has nothing to do with my attraction. It just happened to be she is Thai. But one thing I can tell you is that statistically I will have better chance to find a skinny lady in Thailand than America, especially in old age. My king size bed can only carry up to 300 pounds. And I don’t want to replace my bed.

      Good luck, Tipmonta.

    • Martin1 says:

      Hi Tipmmonta!
      I really liked your comment, so much in it is true!
      I am a European married with a Thai woman from Songkla. I treat her very well, and our relationship goes very well.

      I guess the problem is that many foreigners are in a relationship with people from Isaan.
      They are known to be greedy, and work on bars.

      • Bob says:

        @Martin be careful with the labeling all women from Issan as greedy or working in bars. My wife is from Udon Thani and she has never worked in a bar, had her own business (not paid for by me) and is no way greedy except maybe for my affection and love. I am great with that. There is 22 years difference in age between us (34/56) but she is very mature for her age while still being full of life.
        Her family are all hardworking normal people and they are all very close which I must say I respect and admire. Being the only Falong in the family I am respected the same (no more or less) as everyone which is perfect for me. I have found all the people from Issan to be very caring, very loving and very happy. To label them all as greedy or to work in bars is just ignorant and wrong. While in Thailand If you spend most of your time in the seedy areas of Thailand I could see why someone would say that but just realize even in those areas the young ladies are doing what they are taught to do by other ladies who may not be nice, caring or considerate of others. They also do that work not necessarily because they like it but they can make enough money to support them and their family. Some call it survival while others call it a job. Thai tradition no matter what part of the country your in is to be nice, caring and considerate of other people whether they are family, friends or not.
        My wife has sold her business in Thailand and we now live in the U.S. until I retire. We eventually will move back to Thailand and live out our years there happy and comfortable. My Thai wife (from Issan) is the most beautiful lady I have ever met in both outer and inner beauty. She is so caring, loving and pleasing and only asks for the same from me in return which I am happy to give back in equal amounts.
        I have traveled all over this great world both being in the U.S. Navy and for my work after and what Pearl of Wisdom that I have found is that all cultures have the same, good, bad and indifferent people within them but that Thai people are who I am most happy with. In life what makes you happy, comfortable and at peace is most important where ever that may be. Good Luck To You.

  • Gary says:

    I am an American man, 65 now. Have been living in Thailand for the most of 10 years. Although I still have a home in America.
    Women in America are just plain hard to get to know, and the time I have to put into it is not worth it.
    I am fit and have the funds to live a life in America. But, it is just a pain in the ass for me.
    Keep your wits about you, and South East Asia can be a very nice and rewarding experience.
    Just remember you are the man, and you have to take care of your finances and your life. Everything else will fall into place if you don’t go crazy.
    I don’t date bar girls, gold diggers or crazy Thai women. Set your standards high and don’t settle. And you will be a happy camper in South East Asia.
    You will have to shell out a little money, but make sure it is only what you can afford and are comfortable parting with. Life is good.

    • paul says:

      Hey Gary you make sense; the way you describe yourself is what i picture myself saying in 10 years..glad to hear your sage advice..

      • Ibrox says:

        I don’t profess to be the leading expert on Thai girls but I have been in long term relationships with 3 spanning a period of 15 years so guess I know a thing or 2.

        To give the issue some context I have known many friends and colleagues in the west who have lost a major part of their wealth due to breaking up with their western girlfriends/wifes. Often they were the innocent party but that hasn’t stopped the women taking them to the cleaners.

        That’s why I do not begrudge paying my Thai girlfriend a monthly allowance / salary and have done so with the current girlfriend for 10 years. By doing so, it in effect controls my losses ie I will not lose any more than the allowances I have paid. I made it clear at the outset that she is responsible for any requests for cash from grasping family members (who think she’s suddenly won the lottery because she’s seeing a farang) and which must be paid for out of the allowance.

        I guess that the allowance is quite generous – 50,000 Baht per month but it has worked very well for both of us. Over the years it has enabled her to buy a house, car and travel overseas (the first in her family to do so) and she is still only 32 years old.

        I have had use of her house when I stay in BK and she ferries me back and forth to my place on the coast but the main benefit to me is that she looks after me fantastically well in return, in a way that disappeared many years ago in the west. However, she’s not stupid and she realises that if her standard of care dips then that’s me gone, along with her nice lifestyle.

        So my advice is just swallow the fact that a monthly allowance is pretty much inevitable if you want to be treated like your grandma treated your grandpa back in the 1950’s. It’s also a damned sight cheaper in the long run than the alternative of a controlling, overweight and self opinionated western girlfriend.

        Keep on living the dream!

    • john says:

      I had an occasion which needed an immigration lawyer. He told me how clever the women from SE Asia, especially from the island. They have their social network to exchange information about how to seduce the old farts from the west and how to take advantage of the rules and regulations of host countries once they land on the coast of the western countries. So do not fall into the trap of thinking the Asian ladies are the replica of your grandma in 1940’s. It all depends.

      And they know very well the difference between the men of the west and east. White farts, the Caucasian, are very gullible compare to others. Go to website and check the profiles. You will see a lot of these two Thailand and Philippine women saying specifically “white Caucasian only”. So be forewarned and prepared. The white Caucasians are very sturdy ATM guaranteed for lifetime.

      • Martin says:

        I would exspecially warn you of Philippina women.

        That is the scom of the world, and usually you can’t trust them at all.
        Never “borrow” them money. You wil NOT get it back. They never keep word.

  • Tinman says:

    Hi guys,

    Sorry for the long post in advance! I desperately need some advice. I just came back from my trip in Thailand, and like a little research machine I am, before my trip I read a lot of articles here (btw good job, a lot of good info here) and got informed well for my trip there. My initial plan was normal, me and my friend traveled to Bangkok and around it for 4 days, and then settled in Kata beach near Patong for the remaining 6 days and we would party, and I would maybe hook up with a bar girl or something just for the experience of it all. What I didn’t expect that I would be falling for a Thai girl, 28 years old, cutest thing I have ever seen in my life and the most beautiful smile ever, and I did…sigh…

    It happened a few days before we were meant to leave. I was dancing in club Illuzion on Bangla road in Patong, and I noticed her, and she noticed me, and that was basically it, let’s say something like love on first sight kind of feeling. We were dancing a lot, there were a few kisses, she didn’t even ask me to buy here anything, I even asked if she wanted to drink something, she responded “No! I want you!” which I thought was very cute. We went to play some pool after the club, and then rented a room where we were supposed to just sleep, but we ended up kissing a lot, spooning, hugging, few sexual acts but no penetration because I had no condom, all in all it was very sensual and I felt so connected to her. We both woke up before noon and ended up making out again and doing pretty much the same as the night before. We exchanged contacts, and I told her I wanted to see here that day also since it was my last night there and hers aswell (she works on Ko Phi Phi in a shop owned by her and her family). She texted me first that afternoon already asked how I was, what I was doing, and she said that she had dinner with her family and that we could meet after and that she wants to see me. So, I was waiting for her in this club, and she came, only this time with her friends and they had a table in a club and we were there for a bit, then went dancing to Illuzion for a bit, in that meantime, two of her friends came up to me and told me “You take care of her, take care of my friend!” but at separate occasions. We left the club pretty early, and rented a room again, we were both tired but it didn’t matter, it was all very sensual once again, even more than first night, we had sex 2 times that night, and once more in the morning, with a lot of kissing, caressing, touching, spooning etc. When our time came to an end, she immediately asked me when I would come back to Thailand I told here maybe 1 year I don’t know. We went out seperate ways, and she already texted me later on what I was doing, that she was in the car with her family going back to Ko Phi Phi, she asked me if I missed her, and told me that she missed me too already, and so on, and I told here I would facetime her when I got back home. And yesterday I did that, before that she also texted me first, again asking if I miss her and she misses me very much, and a bit more texting. So then in the afternoon I facetimed her through whatsapp, and we talked a little, she showed me where she lives with her family, and said that she has three kids, 8 months, 5 years, and 10 years old (before that she told me that she had one baby, and didn’t mention the others) and takes care of two more children from her aunt. I asked her where is the father, she said “He is dead to me, I don’t care..” One more detail I have to mention that in the texts before she wrote that she would wait for me to come back to Thailand.

    So what do you guys think based on experience, is this for real? I mean I’m back here home feeling heartsick for her, thinking it’s love, and I feel like I want to teleport myself over there just to see her but the rational part of me is telling me it’s not. I have a new marketing agency a opened up recently, I’m finishing my thesis at university, friends, family… She has three kids and a family over there too, I’m broken to be honest, all I think about is her, and yes, I know it has been only 4 days that I “know” her. So please, if you have some advice or follow up questions please please help! Sorry once again for the long post, but I like to put out all the details! Thanks!

    • C. says:

      Hi Tinman,
      I really feel with you and i understand you and this sounds like a very complicated situation. All i can tell you is that im in a similar situation and i also dont know when i will go back to thailand. My plan now is to stay in contact with her but at the same time just live my regular daily life. I think if you two manage to stay in touch regularly for a longer period you will see if its worth going back and taking a chance with her.
      I hope this helps you. Let me know if theres more news!

      • Bob says:

        @Tinman and C, You both have been bitten by the Thai Love Bug. LOL No in all honesty just give your relationships time. By that talk to her everyday (1 or 2 times) via Line or other Apps and make a point to go visit her one or more times a year. I did this with my Thai Wife for more than 2.5 years before we were married. This way we really got to know all about each other before we were married. I also found out through this way that we are perfect for each other. We have been married now for almost 2 years and everyday still feels like a Honeymoon. It can be that way for you too if you are both right for each other (that is the key) and you are both patient with each other. Good Luck To both of you.

    • Tony says:

      Be very strong, follow the signs for the exit door ASAP and don’t EVER look back. It is by best advice I can give you. Vanish and become irretrievable.
      If you don’t it will screw up the whole of your life till the very end.

    • Kevin E LaBar says:

      It is love. Sell everything you own and move to Thailand. I recently rid myself of all physical possessions except clothes, technology, and golf clubs. It is liberating. I spend 1/3 of my time in LOS, and more as time goes by. Best thing I ever did. She is waiting for you. And if the doomsayers are right, you will have many other opportunities. Yes, i could bash the situation as others do, but live for today. You could die tomorrow.

    • jerkalot says:

      She could be “the one” .. or just another Thai girl having multiple boyfriends. Why was she alone at Iluzion when you met ? Sounds like a freelancer. To my knowledge (I have lived in Thailand 1 year) Thai-girls lives in the moment and she could easily meet someone else in Phi Phi.
      How old are you ? If your about the same age I think she really likes you, but you should facetime a lot to get to know her. If it feels right, go there for a longer period, maybe 2 months. This I think would give you time to see if this is “the one” or just a vacation fling. Best of luck to you, and the most important thing to you, is you :)

    • Gordon says:

      Well. I had that experience too. Sweet girl. Beautiful and so so cute. Living in Asia as a German, divorced a girl from Borneo. All the same. Anyways. Met a few girls in Thailand. This particular one was so sweet. Paid her off, went shopping for my daughter, bought a few pieces for this girl too, cinema, Japanese dinner, went back to my apartment and just slept. Next morning woke up and ate her only cos I ran out of rubbers. We kissed and parted and I promised to see her again. But I didn’t. Stupid I know. She was just to sweet. I hooked up with 2 Russian girls for a threesome whole night. That was the cure. I still think of her (Fern) if that was her real name anyways. But I think it’s better that way. Having been married to a girl from Asia for 13 years I think it’s a big responsibility towards her ungrateful, demanding family. Somemore I have a Child to take care of and she doesn’t want to share my love with another woman. I feel bad cos I feel Fern really wanted me and I wanted her. Well. I don’t need to lecture you. But it all depends on your situation. If you feel it’s right then go for it. But don’t complain. It can be tough.

    • Stan says:

      Hi Tinman
      I have been through this exactly kinda situation 5 years ago .
      It is not for real, expect her to ask you take care of her.
      In the meantime she might talk to other guys as well, god knows how many.
      I am not saying all Thai girls are bad , not at all. But they cannot love at the distance , they think life is too short to wait too long.
      They want fun right now.
      If you come to stay in Thailand with her for life you may be very happy couple, but I guess it is not an option for you at the moment.
      Ok , hope I was helpful.
      I know these things for sure because it has been five years since I retired in Thailand.

    • Kathleen Guate says:

      I am a Western woman who lives in SE Asia. I lived in Thailand for 6 years and have some male friends who after several tries and rip-offs found an older Thai woman who makes them happy. However, I know so so many men who have been taken to the cleaners. Just be realistic: if you are not attractive or overweight or old, it is a scam. You cannot imagine how many times I have heard one of my buddies say, “Oh, but this one is different.” LOL

      • ThaiJ says:

        I was married to a Thai for 9 years, so I have knowledge of them. This situation, err on the side of caution and forget her. Believe me..you met her in a nightclub on Bangla rd?
        To me ,that says it all. Good luck with your decision.

  • Mark says:

    Nice article. I would like some advice if you could be so kind. As a first time visitor to Bangkok I spoke with my tour guide who was 28 and I am 39 and asked her out to eat after the tour. She accepted and we met and had a nice time out, no sex. The next night after her work we went out to eat and had sex on the second night and she spent the night in my hotel. We then continued to meet each night I was there and went out to eat at different places. She kept telling me stories about her ex farang bf who supposedly abused her and how she traveled to all these other countries. I paid for most everything except of course the sex and she later on told me she was living in some temporary housing since she left her ex. Anyway, we talk on the internet after I left and she now wants to visit my country and take time off from her work to see me. Of course, since she claims she only makes like 20k a month I would have to pay. She is gorgeous and always posts on facebook pics of her and has a lot of online friends. She fights with her ex all the time based on the postings and what she says about how her life is ruined and he is sleeping with all these girls. I do not send her money or pay anything now that I left. Anyway is this normal for a Thai girl or am I getting myself into a bad situation?

    • Adam says:

      Hi Mark, from my experience of Thai women I would tread carefully if I was you. Fair enough if she wants to come to your country and you would have to sponsor her. You saying she’s been to a lot of countries and having a shitload of friends on FB would raise concerns. I’d say you are of many temporary bfs to her or maybe not… Just have fun and not get too serious with her, time will tell.

  • Nancy says:

    Thai women should stop going to Bahrain posting up in karaoke bars to hunt for and knowingly sleeping with married men whilst using fake names. They should also refrain from stalking those men and posting photos of their trysts at the nearest hotel on facebook and instagram for wives and children to see once the pathetic men have ditched them in their 3-world pit of hell. Perhaps then they wouldn’t have such disgusting reputations. These women should stop looking for a one way ticket out of the third world by way of married Westerners and find regular employment.

    • Velizar Iliev says:

      Hi Nancy,
      I am married a thai lady and can tell you that the thai culture has been more worthy than western has ever been till the western people and companies have taken control of all natural resources and make thai people like foreigners in Thailand.
      I am from Bulgaria and ame..rican companies take much gold away from here without any benefit for bulgarian people.
      Who creates 1st world, 2nd and 3rd?
      Thai women are the best in the world and you need to talk to them and make clear the important details before big step.
      Jon Jandai – Life is easy. Why do we make it so hard?

  • mark hanli says:


    I am dating a Thai woman who works as a property agent.
    She is giving me many mix signals.
    She is saying she is keen to focus on her career and that she wants to know me slowly.
    We get by everyday with text and LINE and nightly video calls.
    Spend weekends on outing and a weekday meeting.

    She is from Issan and she claims that she is very conservative and want to get the next relationship right – failed with 3 foreign bfs and the last was a Thai man who 2 timed her.

    My question is – what do my Thai girl wants ? she is not behaving like most of the Thai ladies I know. First we have not been intimate and second we have only french kissed. But I have been introduced to her circle of friends and she claims she has spoken to her mother about me.

    I am 15 years her senior. she is at 31 but I look like 40.

    Mark H

    • Alice says:

      From my point of view as a Thai woman, I think she’s serious about the relationship with you right now. It’s obvious from seeing that she introduce you with her friends. So now I think the question might be are you serious or picture yourself with her in the future as well? maybe it’s better to ask her directly and discuss about the situation.

    • Peter says:

      Mark the story of “i need time to know you better” is the oldest trick in the book. She wants time to get to know your wallet my friend. I bet she always says “its up to you”. Meaning “lets see how clever you are”. Get yourself familiar with the low EQ problem in Thai’s and you will not need advice in future

  • Mr-K says:

    Hello redcat,
    Is it common if Thai girl doesn’t speak as much? She doesn’t even lie! :D
    I started dating thai girl recently (and just like you described your ex white and brown gf we had sex on 4th date) and every time we have a conversation it’s me who talks 85% of the time. She is always saying – my life is just normal, nothing special to talk about. She is from southern part of Thailand and lives in Bangkok alone for few years. She’s got no friends here just a job. She did tell me something about her family and past etc. But it seems she’s just hiding something and Is that common here?!! We are meeting every night for 10 days in the row and she never spends her time on the phone like other girls.
    Tnx for your opinion in advance

    • Redcat says:

      I wouldn’t worry about that too much. It’s just a typical personality trait that many Thai women have. Maybe it takes some time until she opens up, I even think it’s good if she doesn’t talk too much – then you can as well get a western woman. It’s usually a good sign and she probably has a good character – just look out for more important things, what she does for you, what she expects from you, does she care about you (are you talking or chatting every day? does she help you with certain things like housework or going to the 7-Eleven for you to buy a beer etc.). Hard to judge that girl from just her being silent, but to answer your question: I think that’s rather positive than negative.

      • Mr-K says:

        Hello again,
        She is always cleaning my apartment and offering to do my loundry! We do talk every day! She always texting me on line throughout the day even when shes at work. And after work asking me to go out. Most of the time she pays for the taxi/ split the bill etc. she does earn quite good money comparing to avarega thai girls (except bar girls) She sometimes stays at my apartment (near surasak bts ) overnight and wakes up 05:00 am in the morning goes home (near thong lo bts ) to get ready for work. It’s just weird that she’s so secretly talking about herself. I was thinking it’s just a Thai personality but talking to other girls I can see she’s completely different.
        P.S. I love your website and it does help a lot for farang like me to understand a lot more about Thai culture etc.

        • Redcat says:

          That all sounds good man, especially that she wakes up so early so she can still stay with you. I had that before, too. That’s exactly the behavior of “good” Thai girls. Definitely good signs :) Thanks for the compliment.

        • Jeff says:

          Watch out man. It doesn’t sounds good at all. I’ve been in such situation once. According to my experience, many “good” Thai girls are :

          1. Narcissistic pervert
          2. Pathological liars
          3. Manipulative with sex
          4. Cold as ice
          5. Fake
          6. Contempt about farangs
          7. They know their worth

          Be cautious. Be very cautious. You’ve been warned.

  • Raj says:

    Thai girls are so bad that that never feel shame on lie they lie like anything I mean they can eat lie they can sleep lie they can dream lie ….. as I have a Thai gf who tells me that she lives with her brother which after few months of our relationship I find he is not her brother but another bf in Thailand and he is staying with her for past 4-5 years .now when I asked her about that bf she gets angry and stop talking to me now when I say ok that means you lied to me then again she replies no she loves me but she keep him for her households and to take care of her parents lives in Thailand now I am totally confused because when ever she is going back to Thailand she never answers my calls after evening I eventually understand that she is staying with her Thai bf for which she cannot receive my calls now when I said her that ok live with your bf and forget about me that is also problem with her she wants me and her Thai man to gather don’t know what to say how to say…….totally confused and most important part of my love story is that I met her with my family members and asked permission for marriage already now don’t know what to say my parents about her or about our relationship??

  • Ryan says:

    No thanks the odds are not good, besides I don’t like to uneducated farmers, I prefer myself some Eastern asians, not bad hybrids

  • Kristina says:

    I am not into dating site nor any had interracial relationship before. But I fully understand why you thought that way about filipino women. I read a lot of blogs and even bad comments about Filipino women, I cannot blame as I know that they are just speaking through their experiences (bad experiences) but the few bad women don’t exactly represent the whole. There are still lot of women here who value trust, respect and truthfulness in a relationship. Though on the other hand, i dont fully agree on what Victoria says because anywhere there are bad and good women. Its not the race, the culture or education that affect their behavior but the upbringing of their parents. So when choosing someone to be your lifetime partner, try to see first her relationship with her family and with other people. Because what kind of person she is to others will definitely shows what kind of character she has.. Personality will be shapened up through good education but remember not all educated are well mannered.

  • lindsay says:

    Fella’s don’t be Gullible, no matter what Asian country, there are beautiful ladies all looking for a partner, many will do anything to connect as means of a passage to get out of their 3rd world country, and there are many decent/honest ladies prepared to stay in their own country. I’ve lived in the Philippines for more that 6 years, and I have seen all types. Even in OZ, there are some women you wouldn’t give the time of day. Be choosey, take you time, DON’T choose one with large age gap, don’t flash the coin around and perhaps you will end up with a partner for life, Good luck

  • Gerry says:

    No matter where they come from it takes a special man to stop a woman from fucking him over and a truck load of good luck

    • Mats says:

      Hi guys!
      Can someone help me out with my situation?
      I wonder if i’m being fooled, or if my situation is common amongst other thai/farang relationstips?
      I met my lady on thai cupid in september. After a few mail, she suggested LINE. There we have had daily contact and videochat. I made clear from the beggining i’m not a wealthy guy, and she says she have her own money. She asked if I talked to other girls, I didnt, and also ended my account at TC. She said I was the only one for her and that she had given up TC aswell. Yesterday I came home from visiting her for 2 weeks, and my impressions are a bit confusing.. for example
      -she wont let me be her friend on FB
      -from the things I can see on FB, it’s obviuos she dated at least 4 guys before me, with the same setup, visiting same places etc.
      -she is a single mom, never married (she says anyway)
      -hate her ex (kids father) and thai guys.
      -good english
      -own business but very small, and even then she has a luxuary condo, brand new SUV, jewellry, etc.. basically she must have more money than me!
      -she says she wants to get married, most important for her
      -and she wants a good father for her kid
      -before I went, she made clear: No sex! And i didnt get it.. but we had oral 3 times
      -we have 14 years age difference, and yes, she is really Beautiful.
      -she have never asked for money (yet) but of cource I paid for all during these days.

      I once read somewhere,, if it’s too good to be true? Then it is so! So my question is, someone out there who can set my mind on eace, and maybe give this a few months more? Or, should I end it quickly??
      Can also add, that next step is that she should come visit me with her kid.. although she says the kid has no passport.. so i’m thinking, ok, lets see if she works it out, and actually coming, or if the question about money for ticket will come up…

      Thankfull for any response

      • Alan Malone says:

        Got introduced to line myself this yr (1st time been Thailand in 6 yr). Met the most stunning woman I ever seen and seen many but as she a bar girl sadly I can never see a future as told me she never be able come England. Do hope all works out for best in end for you. I just reading other people’s comments why sort my head out as wanted get a loan and go off sick so could visit her in April.

      • Steveyam says:

        “-own business but very small, and even then she has a luxuary condo, brand new SUV, jewellry, etc.. ”

        Massive massive alarm bell. Of course they could be the spoils from a previous relationship, but she could be planning the same for you. Or they could be from another (current) relationship.

        I wouldn’t end it yet but I’d dig a whole lot deeper.

      • Longfellow Rogoczy says:

        My suggestion to you is Drop Her Like a Hot Potato!
        She only wants BAHT and will milk you dry if you marry her
        As what this article eludes to:
        THAI women are habitual liars

      • Naowarat Wongyai says:

        I really think you have been set up….
        There are many Thai girls out there who want to stay in Thailand and take turn of her several boyfriends….

        I am currently writing about life in foreign country … not of course Thailand…
        Pointing out that foreign countries and men are not only answer in life…
        So good luck guys …. and thanks for your generous answers….

      • Alex says:

        yes mate move on and quickly…go after university educated women you stand a better chance of meeting the right type, little business lots of material possessions that should speak volumes to you..no sex? After months online your a boy friend she should have banged your brains out the first night, at least the second…your being played by an expert.

      • Rich McAllister says:

        I have a similar situation except she has friended me on Facebook and contacts me in all situations at work with friends and family. We video on LINE apps 3 to 4 times a day. I have been talking with her for almost 2 months and going to see her in December. I am fifty and she is 38 with no kids and very beautiful I myself look much younger than my age and very fit. I have tried to find something about her that is fake or not the truth. As weird as it may be we have fallen for each other and consider possible marriage after we meet. I guess what I’m feeling is that if the woman is hiding things from you and no completely open by introducing you to family and friend I would run from that. I have sent her no money nor has she asked she seems to be financially able to do what she wants( traveling to see friends has a nice car and works for a bank. She even introduced coworkers and her boos to me.I have meet her whole immediate family living in her home even her father. Am I crazy or could everything be as it seems. She wants to come live with me and marry. I want that too but I feel weary and still doubt at times. I am visiting her family and we have plans with her friends. If anyone has advice let me know please.

      • Stan says:

        Oh Matt, you were conned mate, it is very common case in Thailand.
        Yes , while you are thousands miles away they are dating other men, it is normal for freelancers.

      • Gregory says:

        Why not let her come and visit..
        Forva longer time if possible…perhaps suggest she pay half the ticket.

    • Edgar Atiles says:

      Hahaha(555) u win internet comment of the day ,so true bro ! Most guys r lazy n clueless to even try to become a “special man”. Smarten up guys ! break the indoctrination of the slave mentality you’ve been immersed in your whole lives ,learn n be free n conquer.Take pride n work on becoming special,don’t devote your emotions so readily n don’t grovel from behind a computer screen to a girl when your 5000 miles away.Then you won’t need to lick your wounds n mend your broken heart because a 3rd grade educated farm girl from Issan outwitted you. To all you new guys never ever send money,trust me your not the only one.I know, I know she’s different (555).No,they’re almost entirely the same . Men, unite n teach each other ,provide constructive criticism n support because were truly behind the 8 ball ! It’s a bit of tough love ,but oh my Buddha do some knuckleheads need it ,and alot need two truckloads of luck ! Redcat awesome work .

  • Victoria says:

    Marry a Filipina woman – loyal, hard working, highly educated, speaks English (fluently), family oriented, and beautiful. We always win the Miss Universe pageant. We have a temper ONLY IF you abuse us and go behind our backs. We earn our own money and don’t need a man to take care of us – all while taking care of the household chores.

    • lindsay says:

      My goodness Victoria, do you really expect people to believe what you wrote. I don’t believe there is much truth in any of your topics. 3rd largest English speaking country but not many speak fluent English. Family orientated and beauty, yes. Earn your own money, where and how you doing that? very few well paid work in the Phils. Trustworthy, No, Honest, No, Faithfull, No, Good cook, No, Texting/Social networking, Excellent, Shopping, Excellent, take advantage of Foreigners, Yes.Sadly I’ve spent too much time in the Philippines, and unfortunately married one

    • Steveyam says:

      I agree with lindsay. My last Filipina gf cheated on me while lying aswell about what she was doing (going away with her “cousin” for Easter….ahem!!).

      Agree with everything Lindsay says and nothing Victoria says.

    • Niki says:

      What ?? Bit of a weird thread isn’t it ? Your a Filipino ? But your on a site for wjat are thai women like .. ? Strange

      • Ben says:

        I’ve had terrible experiences with Filipino women that rival some of the worst stories from Thailand. Dated two women, one after the other. Both turned out to be compulsive liars. The first that stole my phone and was using it to blackmail other men and work as a prostitute on Craigslist (truly). The second, after a pleasant vacation with her in which I left on good terms, stole my replacement phone also and immediately started dating a new guy within a week after I left the country, dumping me.

      • Edgar Atiles says:

        Yeah Filipinos r weird like that ,true they’re lovely people but many have this massive narcissistic streak,very strange. They opine on things like its gospel n when you don’t agree they go apeshit hahaha. I live in Cebu for going on 3 years n I can’t help but love the people n the women r total charmers ,but like all women- tread very carefully,not all is what it seems my friends.

  • Paul says:

    Guys… Any girl in the bar and club scene is trouble everywhere in the world. Stay away from these girls if you want a relationship! If she regularly drinks or parties, very bad news…

    I run day game in Thailand and go to shopping centres and get numbers. I find most of these girls don’t drink and have had less than 5 partners. These women are the for a relationship!! Very innocent and are good girls!!

    Bad idea to bring her back to the west cause Feminism is mainstream and toxic for their innocent soul!

    • Simon B says:

      Nice comment Paul, I think perhaps the smartest one on this thread. Good luck.
      p.s. I married a Thai lady in Oz that I didn’t meet in a bar!

  • HM says:

    I met this Thai lady aged 35 who was a performing artist (singing and dancing) in a very well-known big nightclub in my country. Not the coyotes or bar girls type in Nana/Sukhumvitk. We exchanged numbers on the 1st time we met as she was a friend of my friend’s Thai gf and we have been communicating daily via Line for a good 8 months. I have visited her in Thailand 3 times in this 8 months and herself 2 times in my country for holidays with her family. Myself, I am 40 and consider myself quite a looker with boyish young looks than my actual age (have been told I look more like 30) working as a director in an MNC.

    There is a nagging concern here that whatever we have is based on a transactional basis, goods and services exchange rather than an actual relationship, so I should be going with my gut instincts? Basically, she did not ask money for her sick buffaloes or sister/brother being hospitalised but will ask for luxury brands or shopping and the likes, in return, she really took care of me, washing, cooking, taking care of my needs as I am unable to speak a word of Thai. No sex yet as she gave me a long lecture into our 3rd month of courtship how she is a prim and proper lady and will not just sleep with someone she met and went on to say how her ex bf courted her for 9 months before they have sex and that she finally regarded him as a bf. It was because of this lecture that I actually respected her and court her like a lady. I have met all her family members except the matriach of the house. At times she will ask for money about 30K baht for her business that she is starting up or she will ask if I could help a little with her expenses for her orthondontic treatment which would cost about 50-60k baht over a period of 2 years.

    She is a Bangkok native, Chinese-Thai, very good command of English through sheer hardwork and diligence to strike it out on her own in a foreign country to earn enough keeps to set up her own business back in Bangkok. Her family all seems well to do, middle class family. Is this how dating a Thai girl works? Taking care means buying gifts, shopping sprees and air tickets to holiday with her family etc? Right now we are still in the ‘courting’ stage and I have said no to some of her requests which she was OK and did not throw up any fuss at all and will always apologise for requesting the monies and such. However it did make me feel bad for not helping her out or rejecting her requests. I have been testing her out and will continue to do so for as long just to make sure that she is in it for having a partner for life not just the monies or luxury items.

    It is my first time dating a Thai lady and has opened up a world of different cultures and just wondering if I should pursue on with this courtship, kind of getting impatient on the sex front (now I hope this does not make me like a sex fiend). She have stopped working the night life as she have done so for the past 7 years and have saved enough money to set up her own business(es). Any advise would be greatly appreciated.


    • professor says:

      She is full of shit. You don’t invest in ANY woman regardless of who her parents are or her ethnicity. A whore is defined by her nature. If you have to pay you better be getting some play. If it’s a serious relationship you’re looking for then be sure she will not ask for extravagances.

      And guys need to stop flashing their dough. It doesn’t impress women that you make good money. It only attracts gold diggers. Hey if she doesn’t know you make good coin and she still hangs out with you then maybe you’ve got something.

      Lastly if she’s not giving it to you she’s giving it to someone else. Women, like men, enjoy sex. There’s no way she’s waiting 9 months for a guy she’s horny for.

      Good luck!

    • Naowarat Wongyai says:

      Yes Professor ,, I a greed totally …. she is full of shit…. and she have taken you and have been…
      There are such a gang who acts like being her family and has / have probably taught her to respond when the very request being rejected…. overall money is only a part of making life more comfortable but it is not all in life…
      Don’t forget some women just only concentrates on earning money … sex can be put aside when she has a whole family is waiting for …
      Sad situation indeed …. but it’s how it is….
      The third world countries still needs to look after thier own families as a bunch of corrupted politicians only push all the budgets inside thier pocket and give little to thier people…
      Which now small talk against the government is punishable….

  • Peron says:

    Okay … I have a Thai girlfriend and she confuses the hell out of me. First shock was discoving that giving her my contact information was equivant to asking her to marry me. It is now the weirdest relationship I have ever been in. I fly back and forth between Vancouver and Bangkok, we spend a couple of hours everydy talking on Line, and while she is not overly emotional and upfront about her feelings, I alwas know how she felt, until lately. The next time I go over, she has told me she wants me to stay with her, at her place. Okay! Sounds good, but now I am more confused than ever as now that I have agreed to stay there, the nature of our talks has changed. Rarely do I get an I miss you anymore, goodnights used to take forever, with all kinds of cute emojis being passed on. Now it feels like I have been married to her for 5 years. A couple of friends told me that when I gave her my email and facebook info after talking to her for a while, as I did like her and wanted to keep in touch, that she sized me up right then and there, and decided that I was the man for her (I am 58, she is 46). All that I had to do was realise that she was right, she is the woman for me. And just like that, her feelings and emotions are under lock and key and I am wondering what is going on … very confusing.

    Oh … and I know she lies to me, because I have caught her doing so. She is also is very good at avoiding the hard questions, like how much will the rent, electricity, water, internet, etc cost? I have had to confront her on a few things, gently, and it is amazing how easily she sidesteps an issue, and after all this time, spent on line and face-to-face, I have yet to really understand what she is thinking about. The only thing she has ever said to me about us is that she hopes we work out?!? Can anyone tell me what that means?

    Whatever, I have some better understanding of her now, reading this artical, and posts. This next year is going to be interesting.

    • Alex says:

      hahahaha….there same as white girls just better looking younger and sexier…..they still have issues then the culture crap hits in…Thais in general don’t give off to many details and its all about not making waves, you my friend should be asking questions of yourself not her, are you needy? what do you want? why put up with something that dont sit well with you?
      I from day one only have ever dated women in Thailand that have been to university and its saved me a lot of trouble and I still had a lot of trouble so work that out.

      Your rule’s should be date university ed women there easy enough to meet, rule 2 is go by your gut feeling it normally is right, 3 stand your ground and say what you need and want, 4 dont put up with crap 5 remember a woman is easily replaced in Thailand you the man are in the box seat so go back to rule 2,3 and 4..

  • Boxter says:

    If you must have a Thai partner, pick one with the same or higher education than yourself. I didn’t and I’m paying for it now.

  • Adam West says:

    My Thai wife (from near Phayao not Isaan… Phew!)) is 5 years older than me and we got married when I was 21. That was over 18 years ago and we have an excellent relationship. Yes she worked in a bar but was not one of those actively seeking customers/clients and I did not pay her anything etc… It was love at first sight so to speak and I also did not pay her father any cash either or ask his permission to marry. We did it informally at a registry office and that was it.. No ceremony, no reletives..(sweet)
    She doesn’t lie but at times just delays telling me when she knows she’s done the wrong thing. She has to work and does a lot as we live in Oz and have investments. The kids are nearly finished high school so we are working towards a healthy retirement..
    She gets western concepts and gets angry when some of her friends do stupid stuff with money and their husbands trust etc…There are issues as in any marriage but Thais seem to exaggerate these such as staying angry for weeks and not talking where as I stay angry for a few minutes..

    There is one thing which is hard to convince them of and that is family… Luckily she has only her father and one sister, and she’s not interested in the rest of her extended family.

    My marriage is successful and we are a team and Thai women are very feminine which is what men like.. But they can be extremely self centred as well but also hard working but lazy in some respects. They don’t seem to be driven to be successful in a western sense but rather more so for there family such as parents and siblings who just can’t make it happen.

    I could go on but that would require more space than here…. cheerio

  • Thai women says:

    Nobody is perfect!
    We are all different.

    “Love ” is not a formula that will give only one answer!

  • Nuad says:

    Sometimes love can happen. .

    But she must have business , and you guys must have plan together.

    My fiancee, from Isan gave me 50% of her shop , we did papers with lawyers and witnesses.

    We will get married when it is correct time.

    It is hard to be in relation with bar girls , it really is.

    You will pay forever.

    Best thing to do, like my Norwegian freind did, he meet one girl who was working in bar, they had feelings for each, loved each other. .and just took her to his country. The end.

    If you will be with bar girl, trust me, it is hard to trust them , unless you are friggin handsome and visit like every month or 2 and pay her at least 30-40 thousand Bhat per month.

    If you really want to marry a girl, say Isan girl, then go in Isan villages and marry one.

    So, conclusion:

    Relation can work if she have business.


    Take her to your country if she is a bar girl.


    Go to the villages and marry real girl.

    Best women in the world hands down, even the prostitutes climax easly becuase no girls like them in the world.

    Bad things about Thai women:

    1-Over over jealousy.
    2-Worry about ur feeling to the point of getting tired.
    3-When they get angry, they can be aggressive.
    4- Can’t trust any, I mean any Thai girl that drinks alcohol, so no Alcohol.
    5- Get drunk easy and get crazy with mao , meaning drunk.

  • Gojira says:

    Hm I actually met a bar girl. It was difficult at first, because she lied a lot at first, and the first time she was very eager in getting me to pay for all sorts of things. I thought that it would be over when i got home. But then we talked and i promised her to come back. She was even crying in front of me.
    We talked over skype everyday for a few months and slowly as she became better at english i liked her more and more. 3 months later I came back and we visited her family. She still lied but didn’t like ask for money anymore as she saw that I did not approve. Instead she didn’t tell me that her family didn’t have enough money for food. I saw it though, but she was scared I would leave her. I didn’t love her though. I told her that I thought we should break up as I saw some of her darker sides. Hitting her siblings. we were also so far apart. She became devastated. She told me that for my sake she would leave now. But I told her I still wanted to talk to her. And then I decided on the plane home that I would still stay with her, and for some reason she was happy. She didn’t care if I was in Thailand or Denmark, as long as I was her boyfriend.
    I’m btw 100 % sure she haven’t cheated, as i can talk to her whenever i like.

    Now I’m thinking of going back again. She still have desire for me to pay for things. Also a bit too much, but she genuenly cares for me. I’m happy with her. It’s not perfect but she is interesting and very caring about everyone.

    My point is: My current girlfriend started out as a typical bargirl, who had crush on me, and as time went she became more and more sensible and she fell in love with me. But she started out a typical bar girl.

  • Calum says:

    I don’t know what kind of Thai girls you have been dating but my experience is very different. My Thai girl friend is a nurse and works in Bangkok. She lives a very strict, honest and faithful life. She never asks me for money and once when she needed medical treatment it was a real struggle for me to get her to take money to pay for a scan she needed. I even offered a buy her second hand laptop and bring it from the UK on my next visit and her reply was I do not need charity. She sends half her wages home to her mother every month to take care of her mum, grandma and younger brother who is still at school.

    She does not lie to me and is very straight talking but has a good heart also. She even refused my help when I offered to help get a wheel chair for her 90 years old Grandma who can’t walk very good now. She told me it was her family and she would manage and take care of them and did not need my money. She is a proud lady and sacrifices many things for the sake of her family.

    • Steve says:

      Your getting set up mate there are none that don’t see Ferlang as money. Granny 90 in a wheelchair would be cheaper to take her out fishing what aged 90 she overdue for the box old son lol to hell with the relatives they only cost you money ! and there is too many of the bastards . Fugg em !! Do what I did marry 1 only not the 48 relies all on the lamb no balls to that my god never never they are not really such good wives they really are not they too uneducated to life itself , mine is 41 with the. Education of a person 14. And that’s being generous ! Very backward after being there for years I can’t say I’ve ever met one that could count to 59 many faults with them I can’t say I find them interested in paying their own way in life ! They want to pay for their lives ! I should married decent euro woman that’s for sure

    • John says:

      After reading all these posts yours was a breath of fresh air, I’m in the beginning stages of a relationship with a Thai girl from C.M. she seems really sweet and a little shy, I wish you the best because she looks like a woman you can devote yourself too which is really hard too find, cheers

  • JohnBoy says:

    This is a good topic to read.I have a Thai gf for the last 6 months( I am in Canada).
    She is cute,loving and very good ☆☆☆☆……Almost everything I read in this article is true…now she keeps telling me to understand her……I was lost as to what she meant after we’ve done everything…..this article helped me “understand her” change in attitude with me.

  • Roland says:

    I have lived i Thailand for more then five years and I enjoy bar life so I think I have some experience. (I have maybe more than 800 bargirls since 1988). I believe that the majority of the “bar girls” don´t have to do that work. most girls don´t want to work many hours i a factory for small money and many don´t mind to have sex. On the contrary. Most of them will tell you what they think you want to hear. I have sometimes come very closed with girls that speaks very open (to open) why and how they feel about their “work”. One go go-girl told me she have orgasm with 20% of her customers (if he is nice, not to drunk and, an advantage if big dick. If to big, more than 22 she don´t let him penetrate! :)) ). I don´t think a western girl going for a one night stand can looking forward to the same. Many “bar girls” ARE genually horny or
    don´t mind and don´t se sex for money so serious.That´s why they go for free if they like you, handsome and young sometimes. They get bigger face in the bar if a popular guy chose them.

    Believe me. But it doesn’t mean everybody is same.

  • Bob Voorhees says:

    Many Thai women are “bar girls” because they have to be. The “safety net” is thin in Thailand and many of the men are self-focused. The vast majority of the Thai women I have met (ones over 30) are gentle, sweet, slow-to-anger, a bit shy, and kind. A man looking for a wife couldn’t find a much better place. Chances are, if you wish to speak English with her, you will need to teach her. Avoid living too near her relatives. Be a gentleman. If she seems overly concerned with money, you know what to do.

  • marmot says:

    I’ve been married for 10 years to a well educated (computer engineer with master’s degree) Bangkok woman who is 25 years younger than myself. We met in Thailand. We ended up traveling to 12 other 3rd world countries for several years. Having met several of her friends and knowing another 2 farang/Thia couples, I’m not convinced that there is one catch all phrase to describe Thai women. They seem as varied as westerners. I have heard of gold diggers here, but also seen that in the U.S. I was married for 21 years in the U.S. to a U.S. woman, and we parted as friends.
    Also, having spoken to a U.S. attorney here who handles many marriage requests from farang, I’m not at all convinced that its necessary to pay money to most Thai parents when marrying their daughter. My wife’s parents are not rich, and initially asked for a large amount of money, but I flatly had my wife tell them that we needed the money to live (true), and they accepted that. I’m sure that some Thai’s would refuse marriage without money, but the attorney said that a small amount should suffice. My wife is more careful with money than I am.
    That’s my story, and many are different, but we are happy.

  • I’m 68 years old and have spent most of my life working and living abroad. I have had many Thai ladies as GF’s you treat them with respect they treat you with respect. I have friends that have been married to Thai gals for 45 years and no problems. Thai ladies are like any ladies you get back exactly what you put into a relationship. There is no double standard when it comes to relationships, if you cheat they will cheat, if you’re cheap they will be cheap, if you’re not a loving mate they will not be a loving mate. Simple facts of life.

  • Thai women says:

    this kind of rubbish article…come on !!!there are over 70 million thai ppl in country..cannot just just all thai women they will have same stereotype….I nv judge farang also…but I knew there’s a lot of farang bird-shit lol

  • K says:

    It’s difficult for a American woman to play the same roles as they did in the fifties as suggested. Men don’t act like men anymore. They all need to be babysat and it seems that they want a submissive woman and a mommy at the same time. You try that.. Never to step up to the plate they want a personal lover and a breadwinner and a woman that will stroke his ego that much more to feel like a man. I think Western men or farangs love the lying as they (generalization) all seem to think its okay.. What happen to acting like a man in order to being treated like one. More and more I see men taking less responsibly and women taking on more.. I guess it’s expected that western women should just oblige… There are many factors of why men love Thai women I think and some has to do with preference, there own personal imbalance, lack of wanting to make any effort and a few more obvious reasons. Which is fine, everyone is different but quit making Western women the excuse as to why you really like having a 12 year old girlfriend. (though this is not true with everyone) I think the Thai culture is friendly and it’s a great place to visit or live for awhile for that matter. If a man or a farang as you call it wants to go to Thailand to find a woman that’s old fashion and more nurturing , so he will be able to pay the bills because the cost of living is so low, that’s one thing, but I find that everyone looks for Thai girls and always has something negative to say about western women as they are always being compared to one another. As if dating a Thai woman is a reaction. I personally couldn’t tolerate half what those thai ladies get dished out but they are probably unaware of whats going on seeing as how there is a language barrier.. And you wonder why they don’t respect men.. They have an acceptable culture where women are validated by men (we all need a little validation) unfortunately it usually means for survival.. Some of the Thai people that I have met have been try obliging and are looking for love – whatever that definition is – Once in awhile, I am sure they find good men and men find good Thai women.. Leave Western women out of it because you failed with them and its obviously their fault in your eyes because that is what the west male population does is point their finger at everyone else.. I don’t know when that started but it did. Hey whatever makes them happy it’s a different culture. We definitely live in a paternalistic world.. It’s illogical and selfish.

    • RH8X says:


      Thanks for validating my lifelong observations of western women. Unrealistic and Unreasonable!!


      Happy in Singapore!!

    • Bill says:

      Another Angry American women with a chip on her shoulders. Very passive aggressive, no one here was asking for her opinion.

    • Mike miller says:

      Lady you are mostly wrong. I am a 50 year old man still in America and never been to Asia but I can tell you as a old fashion guy who believes in working hard, paying all the bills and treating women with the utmost dignity and respect. I have dated to many women to count and been married twice and I can tell you statistically that American women are for sure – like spoiled children. They want a man who looks like a man but acts like a pussy. American women just want to be spoiled with no accountable for their childish actions. They are also hypocritical. Example :If they put a man in his place it’s needed but if we try to put them in their place we are sexist pigs. I’m done with them. Men are looking for women in Third World countries because were simply tired of the American woman and her liberal Ways. Don’t get me started.

      • Jill Nerby says:

        Agree, well put.I despise mannish women and feminine men. Seems “PC” is what’s demanded to the level of absurdity here. For that I don’t blame him for his dislike of western women. Other countries have some of the same I’m sure, but more the exception than the rule. Here in the U.S. on the other hand…….I want my man to be a man. Gender roles don’t have to have negativity attached. There are facts that can be argued, but doesn’t change them. Muscle/brute force is naturally more pronounced in males. I LIKE knowing my husband is strong enough to take care of business when needed and I don’t care who this offends, because perhaps you need that to help you out!

    • Troy Dteel says:

      Hi K. If you think that I like Asian women because I have an imbalance then you’re delusional. And very misinformed. Yep. Lot of us got burned by a ” white western ” woman. Or 2….your generalizations are off base. Will you try to say that we all failed because it’s our fault? The women had no blame. Lol. You don’t know everyone’s story or what they’ve been through. There’s a lot of mental bat shit crazy white bitches in North America. Don’t deny it.