Having Sex With A Thai Bar Girl

Last updated: August 5th, 2016 | in Thai Girls

Every year thousands of airplanes land on Thailand’s airports and they are packed with single men of all ages or men in unhappy relationships or marriages. When they get asked by people back in their home countries what they like about Thailand and why they are going there for holiday every year the answer usually goes like the beaches are so nice, it’s always warm and Thai people are so friendly.

What they are not telling is the main reason for coming to Thailand and that’s because of Thai girls. Some are just out for sexual adventures while others are looking for a girlfriend or wife but what most of them have in common is they go for bar girls. I’d say more than 80 percent of the foreign men coming to Thailand (who are not in healthy relationships) are having sex with a Thai bar girl or any kind of Thai hooker – and out of all these guys not more than 10 percent would admit that to their friends back home.

Having Sex With A Thai Bar GirlA lot of foreigners don’t even want to call them “prostitutes” because they think it’s just so different here in Thailand where you can pay for a girl the first time then get her phone number and arrange the second date for free and the only thing you have to pay for is dinner and whatever she randomly picks up at the 7 eleven while you go buy the condoms. Thai bar girls don’t make you feel bad and guilty by what you are doing, they even give you the feeling that they really like you – which is actually no lie in most cases.

If you haven’t made any experiences with Thai bar girls yet, maybe you haven’t even been to Thailand – this is how you hook up with a Thai bar girl. If you have, just skip reading the following four paragraphs.

You walk into a go go bar or beer bar and take a seat. If you come without female company it will not take long until one of the girls spontaneously comes over to you (not the one that takes your order) or you make eye contact with one of them and when you return her smile she will come over. Standard what she says is like “Hi what your name where you from you come to Thailand for holiday I like you you buy me drink?”

By “drink” she means lady drink and this is one of the three sources of income for bar girls in Thailand and the only reason they call it like that is because these drinks are more expensive than drinks for the customers at around 150 baht (and her share is around 50%, if at all, usually it’s 50-70 Baht) usually no matter if she orders coke or tequila. It will not take more than five minutes for the girl to ask for a lady drink and then usually for a second one before she asks you where you stay and if you want to go to your place together.

There comes the second and most significant part of the Thai bar girl’s income: her price for sex. You have usually two options: Short time, means one shot and for about one or two hours and long time, means several shots and she stays with you until breakfast the following day (or brunch). Short time is between 1,000 and 2,500 Baht and long time between 2,000 and 4,000 Baht. Some girls let you make an offer and just ask “how much you give me” and when you arrange say 1,000 Baht (and she likes you) she sleeps at your place anyway – unless you tell her to leave after which is absolutely fine.

You also have to pay the bar fine (between 500 and 1,000 Baht), that’s the money you pay to the bar so you are allowed to take the girl outside – and it doesn’t include the girl’s share. The third source of income for a Thai bar girl is her salary which is usually quite low if she gets any at all at around 6,000 Baht per month.

Thai Friendly Dating Site

Once it’s time for the girl to leave your place (or short time hotel which are numerous all over Thailand and rooms cost between 300 and 500 Baht for one or two hours) she usually gives you her phone number or other contact detail if you ask her for it. Like this you can arrange to meet and fuck her again before she starts or after she finishes work or on her day off (they usually get 3 days off per month, if she takes more the bar will cut her salary).

Like this a lot of foreigners initially see their new Gik as a cheap and fun fucking friend, but then after a while they start developing feelings for her. “She doesn’t ask for money anymore”, is what they often think but then forget that she will be gone once the restaurant bills, transportation, accommodation, little presents etc. aren’t paid for or provided anymore.

You see a lot of these couples walking hand in hand around town and the guy proudly showing her off like a trophy when the more experienced foreigners and locals are just shaking their heads or making fun of them. The market of prostitution for Thai men is far bigger than for foreigners but Thai men would never let anyone see them hanging out with a hooker or walking around with her in the shopping mall as it would totally damage their reputation.

A lot of foreigners even go as far as marrying bar girls and / or taking them to their home countries – but that should be a different story.

Many foreigners don’t know what differentiates a good Thai girl from a bad Thai girl.

It’s not just the newbies to Thailand but even a lot of expats that live here for years and just don’t get out of the bars of Nana, Pattaya and Patpong. Often they think it’s just so much more easy and fun to hang out with the bar girls instead of making some effort to learning Thai and approaching a girl with an ordinary job.

But maybe another reason why a lot of foreigners fall in love with a bar girl too easily and then they don’t get to learn Thai is because the Thai bar girl’s English is generally decent – at least better than the standard office girl’s – and bar girls are too lazy to teach you Thai anyway, often they don’t even want their Farang boyfriend to speak Thai so they can continue gossiping about him with their friends right in front of his face.

If you have just a couple of Thai girl friends with normal jobs like most expats in Thailand do using Thai Cupid, even uni girls that do no sideline and learn to speak Thai you will easily be able to tell the difference between a good and bad Thai girl not only by how they are speaking but also by how they behave.

One easy, obvious but true thing even beginner students of the Thai language can watch out for is how regularly she uses the polite particle “ka”. Bar girls use it very rarely while Thai girls with a good character do use it in every other sentence – especially when talking to strangers and getting to know new people.

Are Thai bar girls bad girls?

It’s important to know that there is only one reason why Thai girls decide to work in the bar: Because they come from very poor families with the majority from the northeastern region of Thailand (Isaan) and so they are working not just to support themselves but basically the whole family. Does this make them bad girls? I’d say no. You just have to be honest with yourself and don’t believe them too easily that they really like you because it’s their job to make you feel that way so they can get at your money.

Of course there are always exceptions and you can have a successful long term relationship with a Thai bar girl though you have to be aware that you are most likely supporting her financially all the time because she hasn’t got a CV to apply for a normal job (except if you buy her a Thai restaurant or massage shop here or in your home country – but then it’s also you who makes all the investments and owns the business so she is kind of your employee that way). Or maybe you are just lucky enough to find a girl who just started to work in the bar recently.

Well that’s a lot of different thoughts on this hot topic. I know there is so much more to write and discuss about but I think that should be enough for now, I’m curious how you see the whole Thai bar girl topic and look forward to reading your comments on this. Well, one more thing before that:

Is Sex With Thai Bar Girls Safe?

Thailand is among the countries that have the highest rates of people infected by the HIV virus. Obviously the majority of these people are working in the “entertainment industry”. So don’t even think about having sex with a Thai bar girl without using a condom. Every 7-Eleven in Thailand has a wide selection of condoms right at the cashier for as low as 35 Baht for a package of three.

Speaking about safety in terms of the bar girl stealing from you, this is usually not a risk if you pick up the girl from a go go bar where she is employed at so you know where to find her in case there are problems – and she knows that too. It’s a different story with freelancers and it does happen regularly and in a lot of different ways that these Thai girls steal money from foreigners.

About Redcat

Redcat

Redcat lives his dream by living and traveling in Thailand. On Thailand Redcat he shares his experiences and advice to all aspects of (night)life in Thailand. Redcat is also fluent in Thai both spoken and written and is author of the books Thai Beginner’s Course and Thai Love Course.

85 Responses

  • Robert says:

    Yet another story !

    Guys I went to Thailand only because the flight to Bali was cancelled due to a volcanic ash cloud. Phuket, the Jetstar agent said, OK then. So I went to Kata beach away from the madness in Patong. I did not want to meet a girl in a bar and kept away from them. Walked up and down the roads in Kata beach and found the prettiest masseuse and went in.

    Met this girl, sweet and very beautiful, I asked for a happy ending and she said yes. I said no, I will see you after work. … And now three trips later, have learned this about her – She left school at 15 to go to work in a factory to support her mother and younger brother, she never knew her father, was a mother at eighteen, had a violent husband, she nursed her mother through sickness who died six years ago, went into deep debt to pay for her mothers hospital costs, now has a sixteen year old daughter and a younger brother deeply traumatised by his mother death. She worked in Bangkok for ten years as a seamstress and doing clerical work and walked out when a manager very aggressively tried to sexually assault her. She went to Phuket because her cousin was working there. When I met her she had been there for about three months. She could hardly speak any English at all.

    I pieced all this together from her and her first cousin who also works with her. I have spent six weeks with her over the past year and skyping almost everyday. I have been to her house in a village near Korat (yes, she is an Isaan girl), met her daughter in Udon, met her extended family and her cousin at the house in her village and visited her childhood school where her niece is a student. When we went into the small town near her village and every day we would bump into at least half a dozen people who would immediately light up at seeing her and start a conversation.

    She has never asked for money. The first time I saw her I slipped 4,000 baht into her pocket. Because I took her away from work she forfeited a weeks income. She was a bit offended, a few days after I got home her facebook page had a picture of her in the temple making a huge offering to the monks of food and toiletries. The second time I saw her I gave her nothing, last time I gave her 20,000 baht. I kept an eye on what she was earning (she would tell me every few weeks how she was doing) and I knew she was going to be off target to repay her mothers medical bills. The mortgage on her house was on this. I paid the final 10% of the loan, it was not a lot. Many times we would go into a restaurant / shop and she would grab me by the arm and lead me outside – I do not want this – you must save your money she would say. Apart from those times she would never take the initiative, she always would say “up to you”. Now I will not take her to a place which looks more than modest or average.

    So twelve months down the track I know she has other suitors – at what level I am unsure, (and I know she would be foolish to throw all her eggs into one basket). Then you look at her terribly unfortunate background and you forgive her. Who am I to expect her devoted loyalty. I never send her money – she never asks for money. She is a woman, she would be lonely where she is, everyday she is surrounded by women, she works eleven hours a day, seven days a week, there is no holiday pay or sick leave. She never ever complains. She steadfastly refuses to spend more than 200 baht a day on food, and will go without if she thinks she has not made enough the previous day. She sleeps on the floor in a room with her cousin and two other girls. Every single baht she earns goes to pay for her daughters schooling. She does not drink or smoke and has no tattoos. This is all very humbling stuff.

    People say a woman wants security above all else, yes I believe that – remember Thailand has no social security like we have. Only civil servants and a few others get a pension.

    The point I am getting to is this, respectfully listen to everything you hear and get rock solid proof independently. I would discretely ask questions to test her. Just recently I lost contact with her for about a week. Oh, well I thought, that was fun while it lasted. Them she skyped me saying she was in hospital and recovering from dengue fever. I phoned about six hospitals in Phuket town, and sure enough she was there.

    Everything I know about her I have confirmed by other means and/or seen with my own eyes. Only a fool accepts unconditionally what he is told. Never accept what a Thai girl tells you until you have proven it by other means. It makes you respect her even more when you find out that everything you know about her really is the unblemished truth. Bar girls are in an industry geared to offering pleasure to men, and you have to be extremely vigilant. Many massage girls are on the periphery of this too.

    From almost no English to now a very confident grasp of the language, she is an extremely intelligent woman. She remembers everything she hears, talk well, has impeccable manners, dresses beautifully in the few outfits she has and has let me buy for her. Like others have said Isaan girls are true gems, they live their life to make sure others are looked after and put their concerns after others.

    What does the future hold – I cannot answer this – I don’t know. Maybe one of the hidden suitors may take her away. One thing I do know is that most white skinned girls should bow their heads in shame when the see the silent sacrifice that some will make for family.

    If a girl asks for money or tells you something which you know is not true, cut her free as quickly as you can, never give her a second chance. Don’t let her looks cloud your judgement. I have come across quite a few already, and it gets easier each time to spot and discard them. Always have a suite of trick questions to throw at them, to get a feel for what they are about.

    Apologies for the long read !

  • Rollo says:

    I had I fun gogo as company for four month and paid her well. I beleive the start to have feelings real. I’m not naive and spend more than five years in Thailand since 1988. I’m 56 and she was 27. Found her in a gogo bar. My mistake was I started to have feelings. First time with a gogo girl. I offered her pay for a good education to be a cook. Not interested. She loved or liked her work. She didn’t enjoy fuck all customers but mostly felt ok. She even told me that she have orgasm with 20% other customers. No reason to tell me that. Sometimes she go for free if young and handsome fun guy. Many girls do that she claimed. Why lie about that to me? I’m older but maybe not to bad looking for some.

    I went home for business and she Vibered me all day. Only weekends she answer late the day after and even said goodnight at 9 am. No need to be Einstein to understand she was working in nightclub.

    One day she asked for help 1000 usd. I said no. “You’re working why ask me”? If you send money the only difference is she can afford not fuck us older guys and fuck younger handsome for free. Believe me. When I was young I had some girls like that.

    Don’t fall I love and don’t send money!!

    • Jim says:

      I had one gogo I know for long time also. She said if she drunk and have some “feeling” she enjoyed the sex. In 50 guys for 6 months she had orgasm with 25. No reason for her to lie to me at all because she know I can never accept o have a gf that is a whore. She spoke also very open, maybe because I never show I felt disgusted and a little jealous. She didnt like younger than 40 because “they wanna fuck to many times”. She also admit she come more easy if big dick over 18 cm. Unbelievable maybe but I believed her. No normal girl wanna admit al this. But she was not normal.

  • PB says:

    This has been a great lunch read for me, I love the infomation on this site and the comments are such a varation of ideas, Sad, confused, used , loved , scammed the list goes on,and it’s all GREAT. I don’t want to sound as though I know it all I DO NOT, but if we look at bar girls, freelancers or even dating site girls (not all the girls, but some), they are all trying to secure a future whilst there are still able, think about it when the beauty is gone so is the earning potential. So if you are reading this and you are in bussiness, these girls areeffectivly running a bussines and maximising profits . The only difference is they are not selling toothbrushes to cars, they are selling the the only asset they own. That right there body.
    Western cultures look down on prostitution, for anumber of reasons I won’t go into , but you know most of them, why got me beat.
    As for meeting the nice (they are all nice) respectable Thai girl as a life partner, I suggest you look at a few things first , Thai girls are very modest and respectful . If you are realy keen in meeting them then this might help.
    Work out, lose the belly and the tripple chin.
    Learn Thai, don’t expect good (what a horrible word) thai girls to be fluent, some that work in hotels or major shopping centers maybe, but thats not a given either.
    Do not expect that the girl will want to sleep with you on your first date, it may take weks or months, and if she dose sleep with you on the first date, give the relationship idea some thought.
    Expect to take care of her and her family, family is the strongest bond, never try to break it.
    Age has no meaning in Thailand so yes it can happen that a 20 year old will fall in love with a 70 year old, but if thats what you want and I am nobody to judge, spare a thought for her needs in life.
    I keep fit and work out every day, when I am in Thailand the only time I sleep alone is when I want to. I can’t remember the last time I paid for a companion ,bar girl , freelancer or normal working girl. My golden rules are,
    1. Keep fit
    2 Give up the smokes. (very few Thai girls smoke)
    3 Be clean, shave, shower , shit and shampoo andabove all smell nice.
    4 Always be polite, no matter what
    5 Be attentive,do not let your eyes wander, Thai girls are as jealous as hell
    6 Never swear
    7 Get involved in what she want to do, this point is interesting as Thai girls like a man to take the lead, but you will work that out.
    8 BE TOTALY HONEST, if you are in a relationship, for god sake tell her you are, rememer they are jealous as hell, heard of a lot of married men going home to an empty house.
    Well I am not sure if this will help anyone,and I am happy to take critisysm or to to f..k off, but I hope it has

  • Stephen says:

    Every situation is different, you shouldn’t judge from your own history of relationships even with Thai girlfriends. There are good and bad and even mad, you might be the same? I have met bar girls more honest than many supposed moral western women, more kind, caring empathetic and less interested in money, I have also met the master manipulator experienced pros. You need to understand Thai culture, it is very different, love is actually the same there as the West for females it is about a reliable, supportive partner who cares for their emotional wellbeing, yes this does involve financial support same same but same. I know people who have married bargirls and both sides have done well and are happy, there are also the disasters. Thai people are mostly honest and very caring. They have negative traits as we all do, a different approach is required with loss of face etc. They see mostly today, next week is often not considered in any way at all. Their education system is based on respecting elders etc. So they simply see things differently unless they have spent time abroad. Good luck to those guys looking for happiness.

  • DJombo says:

    Heya, I visited Patong Beach in July 2016. Good friend and me went to Bangla Road and on first evening I met this bar girl. She was really friendly and pretty, I got her a few lady drinks and we just talked and played bar games. The next evening we went to the same bar, I got wasted, she got wasted, we kissed and cuddled and she gave me her contact info. Next day we were chilling at the pool and she asked me what I was doing, I told her to come to my hotel and relax at the pool. So she did come and we hung around, had a few drinks and I met her later that night aswell at the bar.

    Since I left we keep chatting and videocalling every day, my brain is telling me to stop because she is a bar girl and sooner or later might ask for money. My heart tells me she is a really nice girl I want to be with. But she is 10 000km away from me and I only have one holiday a year so I can only see her in 11 months and a lot can happen in those 11 months …

    • Rollo says:

      When you’re away she fuck others. Sex doesn’t matter much to them. If you send her money she doesn’t have to fuck ugly guys but young handsome for free. And get big face with friends. Believe me.

    • Michael says:

      Dump and burn bro. Youve had your holiday fun leave it at that.She’s sending those very same sweet emails and pics to a lot of guys for cash and prizes. you don’t really think she’s your for real gf do you? Wake up!!

  • Pdaddy says:

    Wow i read this string and i must say im even more intrigued to get my 6 foot 4 frame bald head and 2000$ or so montly budget working for me! Heading apparently to soap opera land for some, and bliss for everyone else…..i havent read alot of posts of guys having a bad time so thats a good thing…

    I think ill check out thai cupid(even though its not free and some scammers it seems on there)and the bar scene of course….Would anyone reccommend a particularly fun and beautiful area for this? Seems like Cambodia could be good less busy? Lol

    Anyway, im pretty good looking, funny, fun, adventurous, and addicted to all these blogs and vlogs about thailand!!!! Ill be there in Sept./Oct so watch out guys Im gonna steal all ur girlfriends and they will steal all my money!!!!! I hope:)

    Start out in Bangkok? Head to beach? Sound loke a plan all u vets?

    • PB says:

      Hey Paddy, my Irish cousin and I just came back, met a girl from Thai Cupid and only went sight seeing with her. Mate I wasn’t back a day when I got a FR on Facebok andI didn’t tell her my last name ?. Just be careful with that shit it can fuck you up. Bar girls are more fun and harmless. Enjoy

  • Snorbollen Cavallin says:

    My Cambodian girlfriend who used to work at Ibar as a freelancer and only had western boyfriends, three or four at least. She’s the real thing. Even though she has low education it’s Sweden so once we pop out a few babies I can get benefits.

  • [email protected] says:

    I’m Thai and I have to say you are quite full of knowledge.

    When I have sex with women that is not my wife, I always wear condom. Keep that in mind every time when you have sex with someone else other than your wife.

    But then again I don’t even have a girlfriend so wear condom every time is a must. If you mistaken have sex without using condom then you need to do a HIV check which is very scary and I can say it is not a pleasant experience. (I once have to do HIV check because of this)

    Also I think 35 THB condom couldn’t do it for foreigners as 35 THB condoms are usually very small condoms like 49mm. You better use a more costly one that fit your dick like mine using 54mm condoms or if you have a big cock then buy the bigger one.

  • Newbi says:

    Update: So after 5 months I went back to Thailand for a holiday. By now over this girl as a fond memory but still hating the way we ended, it bothered me still. So I met with her just from my own curiosity as I’m in Thailand (What can I say I’m a sucker for an emotional roller coaster). Anyway bottom line was she was fine, same girl I meet before. Cold/ hard at first then normal girl again the next day. One night she gets very drunk and tells me although she really did like me because she’d never gone that long with one person and had so much fun she understands completely why I cannot ever commit to her, it’s a lot to ask to support her and her family and just a fact of her life which she accepts because of her job. It’s no problem she can look after herself like she has all her life. Was genuinely surprised to see me again as she thought I would have forgotten her long ago.. I’ve got the upmost respect for her, she’s tougher than I’ll ever be. We had a nice 6 days together partying, she does not try to play with my emotions and we leave on better terms this time. Although I still like her I’m now much more at peace with my decision and feelings. one thing I have learned that if you are emotionally vunrable (I was when I met her first time after a 8 year break up) then it’s a bad idea to go long time with any of these girls (by long time I mean more than a day, let alone a month!) keep it short time, treat them with respect, give them a tip if they are good and everyone’s happy, otherwise things can just get too complicated…sometimes for both parties. they are all just girls, some good, some bad, trying to survive in a life they have been given…and if your a nice guy the emotional baggage is just not worth it.

  • Steve says:

    Hey Luke,

    Have you been reading my diary? That sounds so much like my first Thai GF. Let me just say it did not end well. Took me 18 months and 800,000 baht before I realized I was being scammed. I think she might have loved me but I think she loved my money even more. Almost word-for-word your story was my story, even the passport, visa and heading back to marry me in Australia. The only difference is that I DID SEND HER money every month. 20k baht a month plus heaps and heaps of extras. She was also half my age and from near Khon Kaen. I met her family, etc etc.

    I then met my current GF who is a third my age (I am 62 and she is 20) and I am having the time of my life. I have been living with her for almost 8 months and the only money she gets from me is free board in my condo, the usual living expenses, restaurants, and a few little gifts in the form of clothing every week. She does not ask for money and I don’t often give her any. We have sex 2-3 times a day and I DO NOT pay for sex and she knows it. I also realize now what a different girl she is compared to the first Thai lady I met. This one is loving, caring, cuddlesome, and a hole heap of fun other than sex. SHe is also very serious about our relationship as am I. I have not been with another woman for more than 7 months even though I am in the sex capital of the world. She also reminds me of my youngest son when he was a teenager. This girl can be a handful, but she is an adorable angel and to be honest, I love her to bits. I have lived with her for almost 8 months and my feelings for her (and hers for me) have not diminished. My main problem, hover, is that she wants a long term relationship but I know that with the HUGE age gap that is almost impossible. I do not want to leave her, so I hope one day she will leave me for a younger man. I will be very sad that day, but I know it is inevitable. In the meantime I am happier than I have ever been in my life.

    Steve

  • Insei says:

    Hi there and sorry in avance for my poor english. I’m just surprised that no one ever bring the question I am about to ask on thé table. I’m obviously not talking about guy like …. well … ‘guy’ because he is kind of the worst in my opinion but about you guys who are 45, 50, 60 or more. When you are falling in love for a girl 20 years younger than you (or more), did you ever ask yourself the question :

    Would I date à girl 20 years older than me even if she looks not bad ?
    How will I do in 10 years ?
    Would I do it if she is rich or if im very poor ?
    Where can I go to meet this kind of girl and date her ?
    Then you can Wonder:where did I meet her ?

    The fact is : no one is wrong to seek for love and happiness even when you are old. As well as no one is wrong to look for money in order to survive and take care of the people you love. I would even say that if being à prostite is not à proud and honorable job, it is at least honest. I feel much more anger against people (I would put my hand on that ‘guy’ is one of them :P) who work in some dark job making dirty money.

    Just wanna tell you one thing you probably forget with time. Love is about many things but one essential. Would your girl put her life on thé balance to save you without any reward more than your life Because you are thé most important person in her life ? If no or not sûre then you are not (or not yet) her soulmate and béliève me, if she is 20 years younger than you, it is not gonna happen, it is more likely to get worst.

    I do not tell you that Because I expérienced it. To be honest you probably are older and smarter or at least wiser than me. I tell you that Because it is obvious but I know that we people are always forgeting obvious thing when they are telling so rude réality. Which is : as you get older and older you can become the friend, thr grandad or dad that bring help and happiness in their life. Or yiu can pay them and have sex with them, you can even marry them and make her life better. But you know that it wont be the same, it wont be rhe same trust. you have been young too just remember your own behavior and try to put yourself in their position.

    What would you do ?

    • Guy Bodart says:

      Ok! First, a guy is not a girl! A guy is looking for beauty , love and young girls. A girls is always looking for security first. Of course she can love you, but do not expect too muck. I am over 60 and all my girlfriends were under 27 years of age. Why, because they want to be with a successful man who has that kind of life, trust me, she will never let you down, because she will be proud of you and do not want to lose you. She will be jealous and very passionate. Trust me. A nice car, nice house etc…The girl is attracted by what you are and love who you are. If you do nothing, you will never keep a pretty girl with you. If you boating, traveling, pilot your own aircraft etc…She will stay and love you because she has security and she will be in love.

    • Jeff Mills says:

      you have many good points–BUT—i remember when i was in my 20s and i knew a thai lady who was 20 years older than me and i would of done anything she wanted—i was her boy toy–when her 50+ year old lady friend came to stay for several months—i slept in the middle—
      this experience stayed with me to this very day—
      now–i am the older guy and i want young thai girls—i sure do not want the 80 year old girl i knew in the past now–shish–
      people are all different—some–the more you give the more they take—
      others—give something back–
      bar girls would probably work in another field if they were qualified and it paid more—
      i know one thing—i always had a good rapport with bar girls in whatever joint i was in—
      i don’t expect some young babe to love me and lay her life down for me—some respect for her elder will do nicely—
      i am going to Thailand soon and I am going enjoy myself and hopefully the girls I am with will enjoy their time with me—I start off in a nice apartment near soi 4 and move to an island after a week—I am not going to worry if i am with 1 or 2 or 10 girls—i will see how i like the first few i meet —i am a Buddhist and it is a big treat for me to visit Thailand–
      it is not just about the pussy or ladyboy ass—

    • Stephen says:

      Excellent mail and comments. I am guessing you might be a Thai female? You are balanced and polite despite some awful comments on here. I sadly enjoy reading them as they are a little bit addictive. People judge too much, was impressed you didn’t and sought to get people to understand

  • Ricardo says:

    I see some pretty narrow-minded and self-centered comments here. Guy Bodart provides a supreme example of this shallow and simple minded attitude. He seems to feel that since he was born a male and traded his time and labor in a way that helped to keep his pimp – oops, I mean his “employer” – rich, that he can openly admit to being a slut who seeks to have sex with a series of young, girls he selects only for the way they look yet he feels superior and judges others negatively for the same behavior – even though they are far more honest and humble about what they do to put food on their tables and care for those for whom they are responsible.

    SOMEHOW people like this never bother to take a step back to look at themselves and realize that they derive their misunderstood and ill-conceived sense “superiority” through trying to use these women and then condemn them for allowing people like themselves to take advantage of them. Kinda makes you wonder who is taking advantage of whom. The SMART ones are the ones who leave their customers extremely happy and don’t have to sell their brains or brawn in order to do so.

    It’s people like Guy Bodart and his childish, shallow, narrow-minded and ill-founded sense of superiority that compels me to have to apologize for being a farang in a country of charming people who westerners have tricked into feeling as though they need to lighten their skin color because “we” control own the amazing marketing abilities of the propaganda box we taught them to watch, worship, and believe.

    Guy, Grow Up and learn some empathy, compassion, and self-awareness.

  • Alan says:

    I was introduced to a Thai two and a half years ago,she has her own small hairdresser shop but admits that she worked as a bargirl for a short time but states that she didn’t go with anyone for sex.She seems a bit naive when it comes to sex,she has two children close to twenty living with her.she has visited me here for three months and stayed with me even when I was truck driving interstate, she said she didn’t want to stay at home but wanted to be with me. I had visited her twice in two years for three weeks each time and spent the whole time together with her. She has never asked for money and when I asked if I could help her answer was if I wanted and only when I could, I have told her that I now retired and I don’t have much money she said not to worry that she would look after me.l am 65 she is 45. She doesn’t make much money either. I believe she is sincere. She is quite attractive and still has a good figure,she would have no trouble finding someone with money but prefers to stay with me so I reckon I’m lucky. I’m going back next week for three weeks and hope to bring her back with me again. I am slim build

  • Jack says:

    I’m going to make some assumptions here. The majority of you here are middle-aged, white, below-average, beta dudes. Let’s not toy with the notion you’re alpha-game quality, because if that was the case you wouldn’t be paying ~$1000 to go to a place where you can barely speak the language just to have sex or to find “true love”.

    Like how so many of you have mentioned, things go downstream when your d1ck starts doing the thinking. You really think a Thai girl, brought up in a heavily-influenced east-Asian culture, surrounded by very handsome Thai men, will consider a long-term relationship with a foreigner like you? You barely speak the language. You’re probably fat (Asians really, really despise fat people). And you have no familiarly with Thai culture.

    All you have is a financial advantage (the dollar > the baht), which they are after. As soon as you run dry, they’ll find another grandpa to hump later.

    • PB says:

      I love what you have to say, you are so very right. I am 54 spent 3 weks in Thailand , didn’t see nearly half what I wanted to see, so back I go in March. For my age I look reasonable. Not ripped but no fat and still have most of my hair. at 178 cm and 105 kg (again no real fat). I got slammed at nightclubs but some real beauties, at first I thought they were frelancers , but they were not. Best 7 days in Patong and the same all over. You are 100% right in your comments. Women are just like men, they like someone who respects themselves . So to addto your comment. Gentlemen unless you a cripple JOIN A GYM

  • BKKBroken says:

    Let it go. I finally did mine and sleep better. You held up your end of the bargain.

    What you saw in the end might have been a preview of things to come.

    I flipped over to Thai Friendly site and within two days have 5 real Thai ladies with jobs, good family, and great looks chatting me up. I’ve settled on for now who is actually well educated, has a govt. job, and has never asked for a thing. Dream come true.

    I can’t figure out why I was falling for the bar girls, but it may have been me feeling like I need to receive them That is a powerful feeling and very narcotic like. Give things time.

  • Newbi says:

    I am experiencing something similar to these stories bit with a twist. I went to Thailand for a career break not looking to go whoring just partying and travelling. Anyway ended up with a freelancer from a nightclub in koe Samui that caught my eye.. Stayed with her 22days in the end! We went holiday together to Chang Mai, had a proper GF experience. Both of us 34, and I’m not unlucky with lady’s back home so not an old man young girl thing. she’d been ‘working’ since 22. Already bought her family a house, car, herself a car etc. Even told me about ex sponsors shed scammed and felt bad about! Speaks Excellent English and we had a great time..temples, night bazaar etc new experiences for both of us, she’d never left Samui . But she’s a hooker a tell myself – can’t go on. she wants money, got a kid and family to support. Too much hassle and risk..Anyway when I get back west big head takes charge and finishes with her, never gonna work probably gonna play me like a fiddle (already asking me to take care of her). Read private dancer and every horror story. She tells me I’m bad to her and blocks me on Facebook. Job done. Except.. Somethings nagging me! I’m feeling I’ve made a mistake with this girl, yes she wants cash but Sense dictates this woman Should take my money – unless I commit to taking her home that is her job, end of. Men complaining about sponsoring girls and them cheating is foolish – they SHOULD keep working unless you make the maximum commitment and take them full time !! So I give myself time to think this through, decompress. Do I really love her or just miss Thailand!? 2m later I’m rational again, not post trip depressed and lovesick, thought through every scenario. I sent her some money which I promised before I left (she didn’t charge me anything for the last 10 days so felt I at least owed her some) but When I text she pretty much says thanks but f*ck off ! WTF? I thought bar girls are meant to try and bleed me dry?! she doesn’t want to know me anymore despite me sending her 40K baht! Now I’m confused, have I let all the bad stories put me off the girl but have a just hurt a genuinely good girl in a bad situation? do I go to try and get her back?? My heads a mess!! Cannot stop thinking about her everyday..

    • Guy Bodart says:

      Listen to me, a whore still a whore and will never change. Especially Asian girls. They love your money, not you! Why you do no try South America. Girls have more self respect of their bodies. I will never lose my time and money for a whore. I was think about Philippines, they are the same. Money, gift etc.. Or they let you down. I know a Brazilian girl, she is hot and never ask for money. It’s the opposite, she want to pay to eat for gas etc…In Tahiti, girls are pretty and much more serious. Of course, in any country a whore still a whore!!! Stop to think about her, you can find much more pretty and real passion with a Latino girl.In my opinion Philippinas are more conservative and serious. They are very pretty too and you can even find a virgin.But, they will always ask for help.I need $20.00 for Christmas, I need $100 for a new bicycle ,$50.00 to feed my family etc.. I do not play that game. I find a serious girl, I investigate her past and I marry her.I am the one who give my name and the honor of my family. They do not bring me anything!Not real love anyway!!! If I want a beauty, I place a phone call and I will get a beautiful call girl. I live in Vegas. But I do not pay for a whore!

  • BKKBroken says:

    Steven,

    Go to Nana Plaza for what you seek. GO GO bars. Check out Bangkok addicts website for the information you seek. The open forum is a gold mine of information and all the questions you have are answered and updated information there.

    The Russians a re fat and ugly compared to the Thais. Why go to Thailand to have sex with a nasty Russian girl. Pimps everywhere too.

    • Guy Bodart says:

      I knew some Russian girls and they were pretty. But I prefer Latina. A lot of curves and very hot and..They do not ask you for money if you want to marry her. I knew 2 girls. One from Sao paolo and the other one from Rio. They did not like the US. I understand the reason why!

      What do you think about Philippines girls….?? Always for money too.

      Try an Italian and you will get a respectful girl. They are really beautiful.

    • Guy Bodart says:

      If you want just to have sex, go to Holland. You will find everything you want

  • Steven says:

    Thanks for this article. Please help me. I will be in Bangkok next month. Is it only possible to have Sex with thai girls in my hotel room? I really dont want the hotel to know that. And also my friends and so on.
    Thanks a Lot

    • BKKBroken says:

      Steven,

      Everyone gets hung up on that at first. Don’t worry about it. The desk will make a record of her visiting and keep her ID. This help keep you safe and is for protection. You could go to a short time hotel for an hour or two, but they are nasty.

      No one is judging you or keeping count.

      Make sure you look at hotels that won’t charge you a joiner fee if the girl goes to you room. There are also hotels that won’t let you do it. Google girl friendly hotels (whatever area your going to) and you should find a sleuth of information.

      If you really don’t want anyone to know, then the in house capability of many BJ bars, or Nana Plaza short time rooms may be your best bet. You’ll get FSE at all.

      • Steven says:

        Thanks man, youre really a big help.

        1.So brothels like we know dont really exist there? Or what exactly is a BJ bar?

        2. Im only interested in the super hot girls. So hot young thais with Fake boobs (but no LB).
        Where do i find them Most likely?

        And 3. Have you ever heard of raja hotel, where a full floor is full with russian girls? If yes, could you recommend it?

        Tank you!
        Cherrs, Steven

  • BKKBroken says:

    Joe, Joe,

    She is the youngest daughter, and from what I can tell the best of the three siblings. Her parents have a home and land. She has no kids, and has actually never been married. Her past does not bother me, and she is very attentive to me and never asks for anything when I am with her. I have to drag her into malls to try and buy new clothes or shoes for her. She always appriciates everyyhing, and when we go out she pays sometimes.

    I’ve been around all of SE Asia for the last 30 years and I know we’ll the scamming type, and she does not fit the bill. I found a good one, and I think I’m going to take the leap. I’ll never buy her a house or land, but I can buy a condo that is mine. If we get married, I can always use a prenup.

    She does care about me, and the thing I like the best is despite having worked in this profession since mid 20s she is not jaded, loud mouthed, and in charge. She behaves like a lady.

    There are some communication issues, but I’m picking up thai quickly, and I speak another Asian language fluently already.

    She was skeptical at first that I really had a deeper felling for than just a one night stand. I understand her caution and she never brought up the issue of needing a husband or long term suppoter. I did all that.

    There are some nightmare scenarios out there and I see train wrecks all the time, but this time, I’m keeping this one. If it doesn’t work out that’s fine. I love fishing, and eventually one bites the hook. lol

  • BKKBroken says:

    I went to BKK in July. Experienced monger in the past and was looking for just some fun and partying in BKK. Ended up hooking with a bar girl and took a liking to her. Came back home and missed her, but racked it up to experience and rarely though about it again.

    Scheduled another trip three months later and ended up with her again for a week. Her mother was ill and needed Gall Bladder surgery. I was skeptic, but she started showing me pics of her mother in a makeshift clinic in Isaan. My friend had a girl from another bar and she was very fluent in English. I used her to probe the illness questions and after sometime, I realized it was true. We really connect and its not all about the pillows.. I enjoy her company and she is very compassionate about people in poverty. Always using her money to help others on the street.

    I left after a week, and had a hard time when I got home realizing that she was stressing out on her moms health issues. She told me she was leaving for Isaan with her sister who does hair in BKK to pay for her moms surgery in a a larger province hospital. I asked about the cost of the operation and it all came out to around 400 dollars or so. She had borrowed money from a friend to cover it. I know her friend who lent her the money and I told her I would pay off the loan for her. I sent 400 dollars and wished her and her mother the best. She started sending me pictures of her mother in the hospital and then everyday during recovery. She had me video chat with her sister and mother while they were in the hospital. It was all legit.

    She took her Mom home after a week and then sent me daily pics of the home, family, and places around her town. She complained of not working ans the fact that funds were tight. She asked for more money,, but I told her I had done my part. I could not give her anymore for now. She managed to make it back to Bangkok on her own with little cash.

    She switched her job from a bar girl to a waitress at my request. I do have an insider at this bar who verified she did switch. I also have some friends who own bars up and down the Nana area and they have taken a drive by too see what she is doing. So far, all is good and she is not hooking.

    I agreed to visit again in Feb. and have set up a 8 day vacation for us both travelling around the country. She asked for some help in January with money, and I will only send here 10,000 baht, which is sufficient for her I think. We talked about how much it cost to live and the importance of being on a budget. I have noticed that she has given everything she ever made to her parents. She is 32 and has never saved a dime. Everything goes to her sister to be passed on to her parents. My guess is that the sister takes a cut, but that is none of my business unless she becomes my wife.

    I have fallen hard, and I care about her and she seems to genuinely care about me, but for all I know this is all a game, which they have time to hone over time. I am married with kids, but it actually feels like I need to help her get out of there, and my own marriage does not give me half the joy I get when I spend time with her. I love my kids and I am on the fence about what to do every damn day. One day I decide I am staying in the marriage, and the next, I am rationalizing how to get out. It is draining me emotionally and I hate it.

    I am almost 50 and have enough money to retire and a pension. I could split half of it with my ex and still be fine to live in Thailand. The down side would be my children. This is the hardest part.

    Do I live my life for me, or forget it all and stay in the current situation? I am still leaning on staying in the current marriage, but it is going to be tough for me to really let go of this whole idea. If things get worse in my current marriage, I may miss the opportunity to grab this girl. I know there are many fish in the Sea, but this one is mine. LOL

    • Guy Bodart says:

      A whore still a whore.I will never fall in love for a prostitute. Asians always ask for money. It’s the reason why they do not care if you are 30 or 80 years old. They are liars! Trust me. know, they look pretty, but go to Columbia and you will see a lot of pretty girls who do not ask for money. Anyway, all the women are prostitutes. They marry you for your money and security…A little bit of love. But men are naive! I trusted girls before and I was wrong. You can chat with girls on the internet and after 2 weeks, they will ask you for a gift or something to eat. They need to do like us. Work,respect yourself and make money. Do not use your ass to make money.

      • JoeJoe says:

        you are absolutely wrong but only partly right. A former bar girl is a woman with invaluable experience and great knowledge of people, a bar girl is also much better sexually. It is of course the safety ovh security they seek, as a man or woman does not? guess what, a Thai bargirl is a woman like all women. Do you have entirely wrong to be sentenced all wore ladies, that finding good and bad people, you seem to have encountered the bad types. Understand you, you have been burned.

        • Guy Bodart says:

          Ok! But I married an American woman and I did not know she was a whore 15 years ago, using drugs etc.. She was very nice to me, but she was stabbing me in the back at the same time about money Sexually, of course she was not bad. A whore is a professional…..But when I knew she was an ex whore, I kicked her ass very fast. She sued me in court asking for my property.Bad luck for her, I was smarter and went to jail.So, I won! And I will never give the name of my respectable family to somebody who not respect herself.It’s an insult. Poor people is not a problem. I prefer to help a poor girl, but not a whore. And what about HIV ? I do not make love with condom to my wife or any girl I know. I am clean, they must prove to me the same.

          • joeJoe says:

            Know that it is respect for each other in relation to a common STD test this, I feel that you should do regardless of color on one’s partner. A former bargirl to their tricks, trying to manipulate the first year, then as she realizes that it is useless, she is not your Hgf or Lt. My wife was working, precisely worked for 10 years in the industry, all the tricks to get “what she wants,” she does not exercise this technology on mine, know that I perceive bg as timid beyond their safe place, bar and friends . A woman who worked and sold his body has only made it for a reason, to get food on the table, then after only a year so they can all tricks to milk the phalanges of money, which I think is right to do, on one of those. different workplace bg / and others have been forced to work on, they need food on the table, clothes, baby schoolbooks and family help. Have gone through the same thing, conceived thought and thought. Do you have feelings for her run on, she has asked you for money, that there will be no money before you have a serious honestly meant relationship. Tell your purposes, to be honest, one of the things that bg / fl may have difficulty with, but who don’t? Everybody sometimes. A former bg/fl don’t want to talk about their past, I feel with my wife strange, 10 years of her past is gone and she do not talk about this years, but life is life, think we all have some black years🙏🏻. Guess what, they are girls, the girls do not want collateral? Once you have seen, take this up and it feels good to Mai Lai Pei.

      • JoeJoe says:

        The only answer is what are your feelings about her. You know her better than anyone here does. Is she attentive to you? Is she protective concerning your spending money? Does she have a lot of gold as per rings, bracelets, necklaces, etc.? Does she have a home in her village? Does she have land? Does she have children? If so how many, how old and who is taking care of them? Does her past bother you and could you live with her past knowing she was a bargirl/freelancer?
        The only advice I would give to you is:
        1) Don’t ever invest more than you can afford to lose, both financially and emotionally.
        2) Be honest and do no harm.

        Every person, Thai or Western, are different. We are all unique that way. However, that doesn’t mean there aren’t common denominators. The main commonality among Thai women is the need for obtaining security. Security means that when they are older, they have a house, they have land, they have gold. Those three things represent the security they need when they get older and can no longer work.

        The closer they get to their sell by date, the greater the need to obtain security. That usually means finding a decent Falang who can take care of them and provide for them. In return, they will take care of you and cater to all of your needs. They will cook, shop, clean, screw and take care of all of your needs. It becomes a symbiotic relationship. Your provide security. They provide to fulfill you needs.

        Guess what – they’re girls.

        • Guy Bodart says:

          As I always said. A girl prefer security than real love. They love you because you are their life insurance. Nothing more!

          • JoeJoe says:

            Is security a way into love, or can love make your bank account secure?
            thai culture is different, Isaan, they need security first, is it a attraction, i promise you that love come. I not a love hunter as before, I prefere a safe and secure relationship whith respect and love. As I write before, she gonna do everything to make you feel good.

  • John says:

    Its pleasure to read your articles.There is in depth thought and lot of important information in it. I just wanted share my small story with you. In Nov 2015,I visited Pattaya. I am 35 .I just wanted to have some fun so I visited some go go bars. Initially I had no plan to hookup with any gogo girl.But one night it happened. I visited one of the best go go’s in Pattaya. I took one drink.Enjoy the dance and I was about to leave the bar.suddenly a very slim and sexy girl called me. I just stopped for a while and turned round,oh my god.she was one of the most sexiest girls in Pattaya go go’s I had seen in my whole week of go go bars visit.I just went up to her and said Hi,she said don’t go,we will have some chat. I said I am too tired and want to sleep. As I never offered any drink to any gogo girl in my whole life.I said I will come tomorrow.Next day I went to same gogo bar and enquire about her,she was doing makeup in her room.Her Bar waitress friend called her. She came and hug me. I order her drink and we started chatting. I directly asked for a date next day. She said I have to barfine her. I said ,I don’t have money right now.so I will come tomorrow.she said you buy my bar waitress friend drink,I didn’t buy her a drink.we had a little ego fight. I said girl I have lot of options but you will lose a handsome guy like me.I left the bar that day. Day after tomorrow I went to same go go bar as it was very near to my hotel. I saw same girl at entrance door. She smiled at me and I called her at my desk. Order a drink for her. Again she said why you are not ordering more drinks? As I was not in favor of ordering more drinks. I straightly ask her why don’t you buy me a drink? She was shocked. She said I work here,I cannot do that. I said I don’t buy any thing for girls.I finally barfine her. I asked her how much? she said 2000 baht for longtime. I didn’t negotiate because rate for that kind of girl was 5000 to 6000.We went out of that bar. I couldn’t believe,sexy go go girl took me to beer bar,we had drinks,after that she took me to near by restaurant.She paid all bills.We went to 7 11 where she bought her self breezer to drink.we talk a lot,share a lot of romance. We came to my hotel ,talk about her past,she is from isaan,she was working in factory in Bangkok. After her brother’s death,she took job of gogo girl in Pattaya for her family needs.We enjoyed the whole night. Next day till after noon she stayed at my room.I took her contact number. Next day I went to same gogo bar at night as it was my last night in Pattaya. I took one drink with her. Kiss her outside the bar,went with heavy heart next day. I am still in contact with her.she never asked me a single penny.It was my first memorable experience in Thailand with a bar girl. There are lot of stories about bar girls who cheated their customers. But I am one of the luck few who got the fun loving,genuine girl who enjoyed my company honestly.

  • Marco says:

    Have been to Thailand a couple times and had my fun, about 2 years ago a met a girl in the Grand Hyatt bar ( great bar by the way) and she was actually a cop off duty ( no crap as i saw her ID) looking for some fun time we spend some amazing three day’s together and when i ask her how much it would cost she never has ask for anything the first night i was a bit skeptical about it but she stuck to it. We departed she called me once but that was it. Sometimes it goes like that you meet some Thai girl ( not easy to find in other South Asian countries thou) that just want to have some relive from their daily struggle in life and have a good time, preferable with a foreigner as its seems that these girls are not fondly interested in their Thai males, so your article is spot on in this respect hence i did not notice the polite particle “ka”Ka thou.

    This time 3 months ago i was again in Thailand on my flight back to Singapore a Thai girl was seated in my seat on the window and i noticed that she enjoyed sitting there , so i offered her to remain in that seat and i took the isle she was really over the moon about it and we got to chit chat a bit but her English like most regular Thai’s was very poor, so i left it with that but i noticed that she was trying to get the conversation going and at some point she was trying to figure out how to fill out her immigration form. I offered my help and could see from her passport that it was the first time that she flying after asking whether she was going on a holiday in Singapore she said that she was offered a job at a massage house, Oho i said what sort of massage and she said this was her first job in Singapore but quickly added “only massage to women” “no man okay”. As it was the first time to Singapore i asked were do you stay she said that room was provide by the business and that she had some friends sitting at the back also going also to the same Parlor or Bar ( have not figured out whether it was Bar with a bunch of Thai girls for fun and pleasure or whether it is a real professional Thai massage house). When we reach destination she said ” i like you, you are a very nice man and gave me her Phone nbr to call her if i wanted to go out with her , i also then gave my contacts and that was that. However a few day later she gave me a call once again thanking me for the help and the chat on the flight, when i asked her how her new job was and whether she liked Singapore she to my surprise she said “NO, I go back to Bangkok the next week”. I guess she must have been recruited to work in a massage parlor and from what i gathered did’t like to mess around with funny Singaporeans or what ever.

    Since we met on that flight this girls calls me almost daily to say how she is doing but the funny thing is that since October she has been employed for 3 weeks in Pucket , but she returned after 10 day’s and then in November she told me that she was going to Hong Kong for a 3 months job but also returned after only 1 week (she did’t tell me a story as i could see the local Hong Kong nbr) when i asked why she was leaving so quickly she said ” i not like this work , people not nice and to cold” Now in December she has been doing work in Bangkok and at the present she is in Surat Thani for 10 day’s.

    It seems to me but i could be wrong that this girl ( 34 years old ) undertakes short term assignments as a Thai masseuse through agents and sometimes finds her self recruited for places such as Bars with Massage Parlors at the back of the outfit and may just not be in the business of fucking around for money or give happy endings. That’s what i think and what my common sense tells me, but of course i can be wrong. This girl is puzzling me, gradually she is been telling me about her family who lives in Chiang mai, that her husband died in a car accident in Malaysia were she studied as a masseuse and that she has a kid . She half Thai /Chinese Malay. Has send photos of all etc. Now she has said that she would like to visit me, i have told her no need to visit me and to keep her money , but maybe i may visit her by the end of the year she was over the moon about it. When i said i will check on making a reservation in a Hotel she said not to do and that i can stay with her as long as i want and she will pick me up at the airport??

    This Girl , as i said is puzzling me, I have no intention of a permanent bonding, i am also not a sorry arse guy what ever the situation maybe , but i am a human that respects other humans and i am certainly not a guy that disrespect women even if they are Gogo/ bar girls, prostitutes or whatsoever. From the little bit i know of her and her behavior, I see her maybe a good close friend to have around when traveling to Thailand and what ever comes from it is okay with me at least i would not need to go and scan the city to find some one to be trusted and have a good time.
    As last at-least in my views i don’t think she is some bar girl or a hooker. But it seems all to good to be through that i would have now twice a free rite ? That leads me to ask, you having more experience in Thailand than i do would like to have your opinion about it.
    Cheers

    • Redcat says:

      Hey Marco,
      Thanks for sharing your experience here! No surprise really that you happened to meet a woman who was just out for some fun. As for the second girl, from what you tell it sounds like she is really working for some kind of agent. However, I haven’t heard of massage girls changing their working location so frequently, it makes more the impression that she is some kind of “holiday escort” that you book before your holiday, your “sexy tour guide” if you want. You can never be sure though until she shows you her work place, then you will know if she tells you the truth.
      Anyway, it’s always good to be skeptical at first with anything Thai people tell you, especially when you meet a Thai girl who knows you are here for holiday and fun. And ultimately, whether we are talking about a Thai bar girl or one with a day job, they are always looking for financial support in the long term. I mentioned it in another post, this is just the way it is and I don’t see any problem with that, they let you feel like a real man and do everything to make you happy if you are able to fulfill your role as the breadwinner. So pretty much the same like in western countries before the “emancipation” of the women.
      So Marcos if you are really curious about her being serious or not then just stay with her permanently for at least a couple of months, and you will know what she is really doing for work and also learn about her character.

  • Me says:

    Vin, if you like her, why not meet her every now and then like you do now. My opinion is to stay unattached for some time first, this is important so you will stay in the lead. I know it’s difficult to wait but your patience will be worth in the end.
    My advice is to go for her, see her every few months, don’t relocate yet.
    Skype worked out well for me and my gf and we be patient for 2 years, living in Thailand now.
    Good luck and enjoy

    • Vin says:

      I did just that. I went back to Thailand two weeks ago and spent a week with her traveling to Northern Thailand in Chiang Mai and Chiang Rai and really got to really know her at a personal level. Even got to meet her family and childhood friends. Now I feel much more comfortable connecting with her. I will probably plan another travel trip with her in the future.

  • addme says:

    Hi.
    How many customer have a normal barlady per week/month in the year rates bolow.
    Workplace Bangkok or Pattaya.

    20-25 years old
    25-30 years old
    30-35 years old

  • Xelena says:

    Hi….may I ask you if girls give pleasure to foreign girls? Same bars? Thanks

  • Vin says:

    Luke, I am in the same boat as you. I was in BKK for the first time in April and was really taken back by a bar girl I met there. I was only there for 3 days with the intention of checking off a bucket list item. The week prior to that I was in the Phillipines doing the same thing and got out without any attachments. The three days in Thailand I bar fined the same girl 3 consecutive days. She was not a stunner by any means but something captured me.

    I am 33 Asian guy living in US and she was 27 so age difference is not that big. I went back to BKK a month later (business travel) and saw her again for the whole time (although I did have one date I lined up with a normal hotter girl but it was awkward). Spent 5 more days there and really bonded even more. At this point I wasn’t thinking and didn’t care if she is a bar girl of queen of thailand, I just flat out like her and same in return (I think). Keep in mind that I paid for everything and gave her cash before leaving so I won’t feel the string attachment. I don’t care I rather pay then deal with drama although she never asked for a dime.

    I returned home and have occasion conversation with her and everything seemed normal until recent weeks where I get calls about how she likes me so much and miss me a lot. I feel that it might be genuine since she never once mentioned about money. She has divorced parents and does not need to support anyone but herself. I planned on going back to BKK in a month (again business trip) to take her to travel to her home town. Not sure about it now since all the drunk calls that I have gotten in the past week about missing me. I am thinking of backing off… Should I take that as a red flag? I’m not afraid to fall for someone but not sure how to look at it.

    I have been mongering for years now without falling into the emotional trap but something about this girl has got me crazy. She is not the typical bar girl that has no conversational intelligence. I feel like I really connected with her and understand her. She taught me many things about being a better person since she is a devoted Buddhist.

    Don’t know what to do… Should I trust her? My gut says yes but many experienced guys say no and reading the comments in there reinforces it. I’m not ready to support her or give her my keys and never would I think I can have a relationship with a bar girl.

    My job involves managing Asia pacific for a global company so I’m in Asia all the time. I am thinking about relocating for this girl…. Am I crazy?

    • JL says:

      vin, i feel you. i am going through exactly the same scenario as yourself. im not sure whats best to do for now.

    • Dr. Mark says:

      As I have posted I am a long time in Thailand guy and have seen most everything woman-wise. I married a high class educated Thai woman from a connected family. As far as I can calculate she has gone through about 30 million baht in 7 years (houses, cars, purses, shoes, you name it). My young Issan girlfriend is a graduate engineer, but sells pussy at the Soi 7 Beergarden 2-3 nights a week after work. In two years with her I have gone through maybe 100,000 baht with her. I am crazy about her because we are both thrill seekers. Her 1/2 sister is a drop dead beauty and sells pussy full time. I could go on and on about family connections in the bar or blowjob shop scene. Us Farang struggle with this stuff, morals, values and our desire to control. As the old saying goes “hang around the barbershop long enough and you will get a haircut.” We cant always avoid falling in love, but we can avoid being stupid and giving our money away. In my case It was an inside job from a rich and educated Thai lady. worse is she does not like or give happy sex anything like the “hooker/engineer”. Hopeless for me.

  • Felix says:

    Strange how lots of people advise ‘Don’t fall in love with a bar girl.’ and ‘Look for a normal girl away from the bars.’ Why would a poor Thai working in a shoe shop be any different to a poor Thai girl working in a Gogo? If you want to find a ‘normal’ nut-crunching Western bitch then stay away from Thailand. Good luck with that. Meanwhile thousands of the most beautiful women in the world await the falang in beer bars and Gogos. They are gorgeous! Love them, and take one for a wife. What could be better?

    • gp says:

      nice one Felix. If they’re poor they’re poor. I get the impression that some comments on this site are from judgemental idiots. If they don’t like foreign women, fine. Just let the rest of us get on with it.

  • john deppner says:

    Hi there.. as a long term visitor to Thailand I can see what’s going on here…Please listen all you guys!, I know the system…never fall for a bar girl. I have a been there and done it, although many years ago ..and over the last few years I have heard endless stories of heartache and financial disaster. These girls are beautiful, often gentle and totally captivating but they have a focus…
    Its not reality!, treat it as a night or week of fun and there are endless fun encounters to be had without fucking up your life.
    Ok..do the few nights of sin and enjoy, but save yourself from misery…. I’m not running these girls down,but trying to prevent any newbies or inexperienced guys experiencing a load of heartache..
    Believe me it is so common .. Guy gets a new lease of life after divorce/ breakup from a hard nosed western woman, and finds himself in a sweet shop full of goodies up for the taking.
    Guys you are in charge here.. its your call.. remember that ! .don’t fall in love….
    I’m sure there are successful farang /bar girl unions….but my advice is just reduce the odds guys and look elsewhere….
    Yes, you can have fun with them but you CAN meet a real genuine girl if you keep away from the main tourist areas of Bangkok , Phuket etc.. don’t meet in a bar!..
    Go to Udon Thani or Any northern town. .It’s an easy fight or train/bus journey. Pick somewhere online..When there Ask around and talk to people. Take your time…use your head.Tell local girls you are hoping to find a nice girl, they will smile and you may be embarrassed, but if you Always smile and be polite and softly spoken its not a problem,…this is the Thai way to success…. Don’t look in bars, nightclubs…and remember,. always polite , well dressed, clean, smell nice….
    go to shops…supermarkets, shopping centres ,even the local markets, street vendors..always be smartly dressed,don’t be shy but always be very polite …ask about things like local markets, places to visit…take a few days, don’t rush into anything….. read the many blogs on Stickman ..its a great site and learn from other western men you meet . Good luck and be careful, Its your life ! I met a really lovely girl this way..good luck !

  • edward partridge says:

    old saying no fool like an old fool or a fool and his gold is soon parted.that said. i ve been down most of those roads and still go back for more possible emotional mayhem ,i tumbled to the dire circumstances their families live in and how the girls do what they do to keep the home fires burning and of course the compulsory babeeee as well .for those not of the hard nosed variety,looking the other way is not always the easiest option,and of course,thats when the shit hits the fan most times.. suppose it boils down down to the fact ,that some of us are not made of clay and it might sound a bit pathetic to some but we can be vulnerable to our emotions.older guys surrounded by gorgeous girls every where is certainly a test for our emotions and/or morals so called..at the end of the day though .if we still get a huge buzz at being seen with or taking her for breakfast next morning ,then thats got to be an excellent thing .compare it to what the alternatives are from where you came and stand back and take a good look cheers ted n z . ps next birthday ..80yrs young and gonna die with a smile on my face

  • Pablo says:

    don’t fall in love with a public convenience

  • Chutima says:

    Sorry to butt in here guys but I think you are not the first and won’t be the last farang to fall for our beautiful young Thai bar girl and the game she plays! Everything you have said, I’ve heard a million time from farang. you hear the calls for money? Over and over but you let your ‘small brain’ rule your big one! Poor poor farang! He never learns!

  • luke says:

    hi,
    thailand eh wow what a place i recently returned from a week long trip to Bangkok and Pattaya with the one intention of touching up as many young thai chicks as possible.
    so a little background as i would like some opinions of my situation please ? I’m an aussie guy 45 years old but look younger separated from my wife 3 months ago (9 months away from divorce) been to Thailand twice before but with lady in hand so this was my first adventure as a single guy. 3 days in Bangkok was great had a couple of girls and some real fun then moved on to Pattaya and it happened
    first night went into a gogo bar having a drink and looking around, some real stunners in here but for me when i connect with a lady ( paying for her or not) its all in the eyes if i see emptiness I’m not interested but if i see sparks I’m keen now this girl wasn’t the youngest nor prettiest (still hot but)in the club this night but i was quite taken by her. so i smile she smiles back we have a drink or two and then I’m paying the bar fine for a short time bam ! she is lovely very attentive and knows what a farang wants then she leaves and goes back to the club. day 2 i find a some action at devils den (another story) and although totally spent its still early so i think lets head over to the go go bar where i met said girl which is in soi metro right near devils den i walk in she sees me runs over big hug and kiss and its on she won’t leave me I’m her man. so i buy her a few drinks but explain that i won’t bar fine her because I’m done sex wise for the day.she say ok where you go and i happily tell her. so for the company I’m happy to buy her some drinks meanwhile she has her arm around me and is kissing me and i happily lap this up then she points to another girl thats my sister will you buy her a drink and I’m like what the hell I’m here for a good time not a longtime so i have one on either side having the time of my life then i say after several drinks its time to go but i tell my girl i will see you tomorrow and she replies “you not lie to me?” i say no I’m not lying “many farang they lie” so true to my word i show up early on day 3 and walk into the bar where I’m met by her beautiful smile so we sit and have one drink together by this time I’m ready to pay the bar fine but this time its a longtime. we go back to the hotel hand in hand so after some fun we start talking she is 25 been working in the bar for 3 months(so she says) from budi ram and is working to pay a lady for a house back home seems legit and i say what about your family do you need to support them no she says younger sister does this she has only worked in the bar for a week apparently ? she has 2 brothers and 4 sisters, she also has a little scar on her belly no stretch marks and say have you had a baby? where she replies “yes but man take baby i no see anymore he was liar he lie to me”apparently he was thai and she was quite young i believe this happens quite a bit in these poorer areas? anyway she stays the night we wake in the morning boom boom and she’s off. day 4 ends up with me catching up with some friends and we end up on walking street and I’ve had a skin full its late around 3am and i head back to the hotel BUT before i head back i think ill have a quick one with my girl as i enter the club she sees me comes running and says how are you where have you been i buy her a drink the usual scenario she asks me to buy her sister a drink and her friend (meanwhile even though I’m quite drunk i know I’m being played to extract more money out of me but i don’t care I’m having a great time) so i tell her I’m going to go home as I’m quite drunk but tomorrow night is my last night in town so i will see her then. day 5 true to my word i show up at the club at around 6pm and barfine her straight away now its important to note that even though i had seen this girl every night and barfined her now 3 times i always paid her the full price. so i said lets go and have some dinner ok she says and i go the whole hog off the hilton for a great dinner after all its my last night in town and I’m on holiday so wtf soon after sitting down i can tell she out of her normal surroundings and she can see by the menu that the bills probably going to be more than her monthly salary (maybe she thinks she hits the goldmine here i don’t know) anyway we have dinner go back to the room, do it and after we are just cuddling in bed she is like “when you go home i will miss you, when you come back?” and i reply i will miss you too and thats true it not very often a 45 year old guy has a 25 year old smokin hot tiny chick by his side. she also explains how she doesn’t like working in the bar and doesn’t like the old farang but she knows this is her only chance to marry a farang.and tells me about how one day a local lady returned to her village with a farang in tow and everyone looked up to her.(I’m guessing they though wow she has made it ?) we wake up on my leaving day after a farewell party in bed we shower get changed she comes and sits on my lap and starts balling “i don’t want you to go home, i will miss you, you are lovely man,” god dammit she really pulling at my emotions now so i say here’s my number lets stay in touch “ok when you come back 6 months?” and i reluctantly say yes (my plans are holiday once a year) but she has me right where she wants me right now I’m thinking about bringing her back to Australia already. so she says my phone no good to call can’t take picture which is true she shows me its a brick and falling apart. now i always travel with a spare phone so i think wtf i give her my old iPhone ( i don’t need it anyway) after i wipe it i give it too her and she goes on her way with tears in her eyes. omg
    so at this stage I’m thinking to myself all the way the the airport what if ? should i ?
    now my intention was to go to Thailand have a great time and go home no strings attached.
    but this chick she’s got my heart so 8 hours later I’m in Singapore waiting to board my flight back to Australia and she rings me “i miss you i miss you” her english is good but sometimes limited and i speak no thai anyway i get back to Australia and start looking into visas etc and reading a few websites about bring her home with me. now its important to note i have stuff all money I’m no rich farang like she thinks i am.
    2 days later i call her and she’s gone back to budi ram because lady whom owns the house she is paying off wants money so i think no problems she made a nice packet off me this should be fine. meanwhile she is on the phone to me saying she doesn’t want to work in the bar anymore she wants to stay in budi ram so i say yes do it get out of the bar she wants to buy a market stall and sell food but she has no money she needs 30000 baht, i say i have no money i can’t give you money (which is true) but I’m not sending anything anyway, i just won’t do it sorry she says she will have to go and work in the bar again so i say ok thats fine as i can’t send you money she asks when you come back? meanwhile I’m head over heels for this girl and say i can come back in 3 months which is stretching it financially for me but i think wtf its better than sending cash which i don’t know where or whats its purpose. so needless to say the first week home after phone conversations everyday was quite tough emotionally. each time we talk on the phone she says she has no money and i say no I’m not sending any but i tell her i can bring her to Australia i will get her a passport and visa she is scared i will sell her ! really i won’t sell you i will love you and make you my wife i say she asks questions about it and generally seems interested in the potential and I’m truly considering this myself it wasn’t my plan to remarry but hell she’s seems a good girl?
    which brings me to the question to all you readers out there its 3 weeks later and my emotions have settled down some what, we still talk on the phone and i send her txts in thai via google translate but i still feel something for her. admittedly i can now make a rational decision a few weeks ago who knows ?
    what do i do ? do i forget about her? do i pursue it and fly over there in 3 months get her a passport and a visa and go through all the red tape and struggle to get her back to Australia not to mention the $5 grand aud at least
    is she going to be faithful too me or just a gold digger ?
    i don’t know any advise is appreciated
    cheers luke

    • Redcat says:

      Hey mate, thanks for sharing your story here! If you want my opinion: I wouldn’t get into relationships with hookers. Have fun but don’t fall in love. I highly recommend you to read the book “Private Dancer” it answers all of your questions.

      • luke says:

        yeah thanks so much i know your right! but i can’t help but look for the good in people i have already discontinued calling/txting her.
        but with so much bad in the bars and gogos do you think there is any good girls somewhere trapped in the mix ?
        just interested in your opinion ?
        cheers luke

        • Kiddy says:

          I really not recommend ..my father was making a huge mistake with Thai hooker..just careful ..you never can trust these kinds of people and you will regret later on ..I tell you ..you can’t go with these kinds of person amoug your community …..just my opinion …

    • Cal says:

      Luke, dude, love your story, but please use paragraphs and punctuation next time. Man, that was a rough read. lol.

    • Guy Bodart says:

      Do not be an idiot, you will never find a virgin girl in a bar. Only prostitutes! As all prostitutes they are very nice too…When you pay When a girl talks to you about money, just let her down. If you go to Thailand to have fun it’s good. But if you are looking for a serious girl, investigate her. How many boyfriends, HIV or if she says she is a virgin, you chose the doctor yourself ,not her. Money buy everything in those countries. South American girls are really great and more serious. But you must talk about marriage and never talk about money. It’s not their business.
      A prostitute will always be a prostitute! Never forget that!!!

    • Guy Bodart says:

      Age is not important for an Asian girl. Money is important. If they do not have self respect why do you expect she will respect you?

  • captain aotearoa says:

    I’m planning a Thai trip for 2015…Thai women are so much better than women here in New Zealand who are the biggest slut-bags on earth. so slutty are they kiwi girls that they make the Thai bar girls look like wife material.

  • Sven says:

    Bar girls are all different. I lived with three over the last 14 years. i am now happily marries to a girl half my age for the last 6 years. Treat them well and responsibly and you’ll be fine.

  • Graham Petley (UK) says:

    Good to see a balanced comment on bar girls. I went to Patong in April with no intention of forming a relationship but it happened. I went back in June for a week to see her and it was good. I even met her family who live near Khon Kaen. Quite a hike from Phuket. They are very poor. 3 weeks later she has returned home to live, on the basis of our relationship. I thought this was great until reality kicked in. She will be lucky to earn 10000 baht per month. I will send money but I am not rich by western standards.
    I think the point I’m making is that there are good girls out there and your point about poor backgrounds is pertinent. This girl has provided enough money for her parents to have a weather-proof home compared to the tin shack they had previously. I have seen it so it is not a lie. Everything she has done is for her family, she has nothing. This a big reason I like her so much. I would be interested if you know of anyone else has had similar experience. I felt welcomed by her family in an area where there are not many farang.
    I realise this sounds incredibly naive but it feels real to me. My warning to anyone would be to think long and hard before contacting a Thai girl. I am 100% this one is genuine but I can only see problems. I have 2 choices – turn my back on on a decent human being and hurt her deeply, or face up to my responsibilities and do my best. I repeat my warning as I am now finding it really difficult. And, yes, there is a large age difference.

    Graham

    • dakidd says:

      Graham…ask yourself this question?..what would a hot slim thai girl be doing with an old buzzard like you? ill tell you…$$$$…dark skinned girls..need falangs…no farkin hope otherwise…there the aborigines of australia…looked down upon..your the meal ticket..hope of a better life…stop using emotion and use your small brain for a sec…enjoy the ride..expect the worst…enjoy the time you have…mate …thailand..in my opinion is a tourist destination and for old codgers wanting to check out..with there own slice of paradise..im 38 with an issan girl for 3 years..i pay every month..but i write that off.. she makes me feel good…i go up and down every 6 months.. makes me feel good..soon ill get bored ..might move on ..i burned my emotions years ago..i tell her like it is…i wont share her..ill pay all expenses when im in thailand..and thats it…sooner or later ..sometins gonna give..and ill go back and get a younger one..when you have cash graham ..worlds your oyster..you do whatever you want…stop this bullshit about responsibilities and being kind..or youll get your gutts ripped open without you realising it…how do you think she built that house dumbass..she opened her boom gates…your the next stage…you know fark it…PEOPLE like you deserve to be burned…lifes tough pal..DEAL WITH IT!!!

      • Vince says:

        dakidd, it doesn’t matter what opinion you have about Graham and his story, you totally miss respect towards him with the words you’re writing. Your brain might be bigger than Graham’s but it’s full of shit and frustration. And if you think that people like Graham deserve to get burned then you dafuckingkidd deserve to get buried under the ashes of your own frustration.

        • gp says:

          Thanks Vince. I couldn’t be bothered to reply to dakidd as it seemed obvious he’d been burnt or is just a bitter person all over. I do object to saying he has a bigger brain but see your reasoning!

      • Jack says:

        What Vince said!

  • wanderer says:

    awesome website! Can you list any more bars like Climaxxx that you consider good for meeting non-pro Thai girls looking to meet foreigners? thanks for all your excellent info!

  • futuretaveler says:

    hey, I read many of your article here cause I will probably go to Thailand next winter with one of my friend. Ty for all the good info and tips about the way of life in Thailand.

    Still it really made me wondering. Is there some regular bar in Thailand where you can hang out and talk to girls that are not prostitute and see outside of there without paying (if they are interested)? Like regular working/student girls or they usually don’t hang out in bars?

    I’m not judging at all and it’s not the 20-50$ it would cost me that is a problem when the flight will cost me 1500$, but the fact I’m getting a girl back into my room not cause she want to but cause she need money is kind of a turn off for me.

    haha ofc I might change my mind over there, but that’s not the state of mind I’m in right now

    To give you extra info, I’m in my early 20s, gonna be there for about a month, will try to learn to speak some basic thai before leaving (still not expecting to be any good at it) and we will only going in bk for a couple of days

    oh and also, hows the things over there with the army taking over the gouvernement? is it safe for tourist and is it possible to travel cause of it?

    • Redcat says:

      Hey man, sure there are actually far more normal bars than go go’s and beer bars that I’ve been talking about here. And yes it’s easy to hook up with a Thai girl in these bars in the tourist areas and you pay her nothing more than a drink or two if any at all.

      In Bangkok, try Gulliver’s on Khaosan Road or Climaxx on Sukhumvit Soi 11, I’d say about 80% of the girls in these bars are not asking for money and just out for fun and adventures with foreigners. The rest like 20% might be freelancers.

      Yes, it’s absolutely safe to travel around Thailand now. Life is as usual except for the curfew from midnight to 4am but they already lifted it in most tourist destinations (Bangkok and Chiang Mai not included).

    • [email protected] says:

      you are all nothing. Your thai bar girls are dark skinned race. superdark like charchoal, brown living below proverty line that thai men do not want and even other asian men do not want to buy. Thailand is a land of black majoriy and white minority. it is africa in the east.

    • naser says:

      There are many thai lady cheaters.

      Yes friend, i have burned my finger, she was a bitch, who slept with me and cheated. These bitches are cheaters and i think its passes from generation to generations. She is so dirty and always speak about family poor and baby sick. I gave her money and she cheated me a lot. I am just hopping that i don’t get Aids. Shame on her and her family.


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