You have probably heard the saying “Once you go Asian, you can’t go back to Caucasian” and I can tell you from my experience that it’s true. But I would even go a step further: Once you had a Thai girlfriend, and I mean not just dating but a real relationship, then you might find girls from other Asian countries not as suitable for having as a girlfriend. Because you will always remember how caring your Thai girl was and all the little things she did for you.
Just as an example a few months ago I revisited the Philippines and the ones who know me know that I’m super fond of Filipina girls and you could even argue that they have, on average, better bodies than the Thai girls (nicer curves, bigger hips and natural breasts). But then one of the main reasons I wouldn’t like to have one as my girlfriend (compared to Western girls yes, but compared to Thai girls no) is that they want to be entertained much more. I was just sitting quietly in the bus to SM Seaside Mall for a few minutes next to that girl in Cebu I was seeing at that time, reflecting on my trip and thinking what I was going to do next, and she was constantly asking me “are you ok?”. I know it’s so simple, but Thai girls have a much better sense of when to better stay silent and let their guy do their thing. Or just think.
I’m not saying that I made only positive experiences with my girlfriends in Thailand. If you read my blog regularly then you might remember the story of my beautiful light skinned girl that was perfect to show around and to look at, but the longer we stayed together and tried to have a proper relationship (well, at least I did) it turned out that she was more concerned of me taking care of her – both financially and personally. No cooking. No laundry. No ironing.
But then those are really the rare exceptions when you try to pick a super beautiful girl who has been staring at and hitting by guys as soon as she leaves the door since she was 13 and therefore develops this “I can choose” attitude – in Thai lʉ̂ak dâai (เลือกได้). Obviously it’s similar with Thai bar girls who are usually lazy – in Thai kîi-gìat, ขี้เกียจ – because they don’t actually “work” for their money and so you shouldn’t expect them to take care of you very well.
Side note: When you pay them (for sex) and they don’t do a good job that would be called bɔ̀-rí-gaan mâi dii, บริการไม่ดี, service not good, and when they don’t even keep their promises (like refuse to give you a blow job even though they said they would do so back in the bar or just let you do all the work and taking no effort at all) then you could call them kîi-goong, ขี้โกง, cheating, fraud, scamp. Just a little Thai lesson here on the side.
With those two types of girls out of the way, the remaining 90% of girls you meet in Thailand will make you feel happy and content on a daily basis. And there are so many things they will do for you as their boyfriend that make you love them:
1. Sense for how I feel and being considerate
One of the best reasons to take yourself a Thai girlfriend is that she has a great sense of which mood you are currently in, how you feel and to act accordingly. She is not expecting it to be the other way around. If she feels you are busy, thinking and need some time for yourself she won’t come up with “Come on, what’s going on? We should talk with each other about everything.” Of course she would ask if everything is okay if you remain silent for hours, but I guess you get my point. Similar when you are happy, smiling and want to talk about anything she can adopt that positive energy in no time and be on the same emotional level.
2. Time and freedom for myself
I regularly go out by myself or meet up with some of my friends (at least once a week) and that’s totally fine for my girlfriend. Now with any western girlfriend I’ve had she would either call me “selfish” making that a regular habit or instead do it the same and go out partying as well. Different for my Thai girl who is just a good girl (in Thai dèk dii, เด็กดี, literally good child) and usually stays at home to get some work done, watch TV or chat with friends. She doesn’t even make a big story when I go to Cambodia for an extended 10 day visa run trip. Good luck finding a western girl who doesn’t make a big issue out of that.
3. Gratefulness – no demanding or high expectations
Another thing I love about my Thai girlfriend is that she doesn’t expect me to live up to certain expectations. She has never asked me “where will we go for our next trip” but then when I take her somewhere she is really happy and shows how grateful she is. Like last December we went to Koh Samui for a long weekend and it was the first time she has ever taken an airplane. She wouldn’t have complained if we took the night train and ferry (and still be grateful for me taking her on a trip) but like that I feel happy to make such things possible for her. And she certainly knows that. Similar for going to a nice restaurant, she never asks me to take her to one but every time I do she feels happy and says how romantic it is.
4. Cooking at home
When I told my former Thai student from England that I got a new girlfriend and it’s going really well the first thing he asked was: “Can she cook?” At that time I wasn’t sure because I was living in a small studio with no kitchen. He wisely told me that one of the most important things to look out for in a woman is if she can feed you (and your children in the future). Sex isn’t nearly as important. Okay I’m not saying that our sex is bad (even though it became quite infrequently to be honest) but what I can definitely assure you after we recently moved to our new and bigger 1-bedroom apartment in Ratchada is she could cook fine from the beginning and it’s getting better every week. Many Thai girls may say they can’t cook, but that’s usually because they are afraid you don’t like it and don’t want to create high expectations. You’ll be amazed what the average Thai girl can cook for you if you just ask them to compared to the average western girls these days – and doesn’t ask you to wash the dishes afterwards. Which brings me to the next point.
5. Doing housework
Just while I’m writing these lines my Thai girlfriend is out on the balcony and doing some laundry for our trip to Germany tomorrow. By hand washing. She never even once attempted to “making rules” about who is responsible for which household tasks. She is just doing everything without complaining. Do I feel bad or guilty about it? Not at all. Maybe I would if I just sat at home drinking beer and watching TV all day while sending her to work. Like a lot of Thai guys do. But that’s clearly not the case: She does have a full time job but her salary is barely enough to pay all her own bills. I just ordered her a new pair of adidas shoes on Amazon Germany for 69 Euros. Whenever we go out to a restaurant, bar or on a trip I’m usually paying for both of us. That’s basically the “rules” and I’m very happy the way it is and that she always has my back so I can concentrate on my own things.
6. She likes football
One thing you will notice when dating a Thai woman is that you can make them feel interested, even enthusiastic, about something you like. I have German TV at my apartment in Bangkok and it’s kind of a ritual for me to watch the games of my favorite football club, Bayern Munich, every weekend. Not only does she watch every single match with me, but she is also really excited about it, asks me things like what the different competitions are, if the opponent is the new small team from the second division, how many people there are in the stadium and even starts commenting on things like that Dortmund has a bad day losing the ball too easily (sǐa bɔɔn ngâai, เสียบอลง่าย). Just look around in the local Thai bars and you’ll see many guys’ girlfriends being equally enthusiastic about their boyfriends favorite thing (usually watching English Premier League) and even wearing football jerseys.
7. Wearing dresses
Not sure what happened with women in the western world and why they are wearing dresses not nearly as regularly as they did 50 years ago. Probably it has something to do with the emancipation of the women and that they feel more confident in demanding equal rights not just from their boyfriends but really from everyone by wearing pants. They don’t appear that strong and powerful wearing cute dresses. But guess what that’s what we guys love and Thai women just look so much more feminin in their dresses compared to western women.
8. Open to do (new) things
One of the phrases you’ll hear quite often when having a Thai girlfriend is “up to you” – in Thai lɛ́ɛo-dtɛ̀ɛ (แล้วแต่). And against common belief that’s not usually another way to say “I don’t care, do what you want” but rather another wonderful characteristic of Thai girlfriends to be considerate or thoughtful (greeng-jai, เกรงใจ) and let their boyfriends choose the restaurant, the hotel room, the new TV or the next trip destination. Sure they’ll also tell you what they like, but if they feel you really want (to do) something they don’t come up with things like “I have a rule that…” or “I don’t do…”.
9. No rush
My girlfriend has never reproached me for doing something too slowly or lose her temper because she has to wait longer than expected. And that feels great. The only time she tells me to “hurry up” is when I go out on Friday after work, then she usually tells me “rîip glàp ná kâ” (รีบกลับนะค่ะ) – hurry to come back. But that’s rather a cute way of telling me that she is worried (hùang, ห่วง) about me and that she stays in the apartment to wait for me. She would never make me commit to a time to come back.
10. Taking care of children
I saw her smiling and talking to young children many times when we were out together, but the first time I realized how great my Thai girlfriend is with dealing with babies and children was when my sister and her husband came to Thailand for their honeymoon back in January (Bangkok and Khao Lak). They took their 1 year and 5 month young daughter with them and from the first moment she started holding, talking and playing with her and making the young girl laugh and feel excited. I knew I had just discovered another fantastic skill of her and another thing I love so much about her.
11. Gets what she wants without appearing demanding or greedy
Well the first ten points were pretty much centered towards things she does for me as her boyfriend. But then it’s not like she is sacrificing her whole life and free time to do things for me. Of course she is getting more or less exactly what she wants: A nice apartment to live in. Regular trips. A night out together or dinner at a new restaurant usually once a week. And most importantly: My love and gratefulness. You just need to get your finances right and find a good Thai girlfriend and you’ll get back so much from her it’s amazing.
You see I haven’t even touched body features and looks of my Thai girlfriend and that’s not because I’m lazy, but because I have already covered that in my article on why Thai girls are better than western women.