Don’t Move to Thailand With Your Farang Girlfriend

Last updated: January 11th, 2017 | in Living

If there’s one thing I haven’t experienced here in Thailand, then that would be dating a farang girl. And while I don’t know of any foreigners who actually fell in love here with a woman from their home country (once you had Asian you can’t do Caucasian), there are quite a few who actually move here with their beloved ones from back home. My friend Stephen from the UK has done just that last year and I could finally convince him to write about his experience on Thailand Redcat. Enjoy!

If you are reading this and thinking about moving to Thailand with your farang girlfriend then take my advice and don’t do it or if you are reading this and are already living here with your farang girlfriend, I know how you are feeling. You might want to read the rest of my article.

I have recently done the probably hardest thing a man might ever have to do and that is to break up with a farang girlfriend in a foreign country. At the time of writing I am now six weeks into single life and have never been so happy but trust me it wasn’t easy plus I had over a year of what felt like jail sentence.

It’s important to mention that in western countries (I know for sure in the UK) many men tend to “settle” for a girl regardless of looks and simply because it’s easy or they get on okay. Now that’s not to say there is anything wrong with that. I’m sure many of them go on to have long and fulfilling relationships. However if you are thinking of moving here just remember that in Thailand and many Asian countries you will be working by a different set of rules. I certainly settled when I was in the UK and boy I realized you don’t simply have to settle for the first girl you find over here.

Now I’m sure there are exceptions. In fact I know of one married expat couple that seem happy and he claims not to find Thai women attractive (must be in denial) but I think in general 9 out 10 relationships that arrive in Bangkok finish within a year. This is simply based on other anecdotal stories from other expat colleagues, my expat friends, Thai girls friends’ opinions and observing expat couples in Bangkok.

Before we broke up I spoke to my co-workers and I was pleased to hear that I was not the only one that has had this problem. Speaking to them I realised this appears to be a classic problem and they assured me that the men that move to Thailand with their farang girlfriend the relationship on average usually lasts about a year. So whatever happens it will end eventually, just save everyone the hassle and don’t do it in the first place. I’m going to tell you why.

Now before I begin sharing my experience I am not for one minute saying that this type of relationship cannot work in Thailand because I am sure there are exceptions and in fact I know there are, especially around the international school scene. This I believe has more to do with the social life and mixing with other farang couples plus also international school teachers often only spend maybe a year two here before moving onto another country. I know this because I have been to parties where there are literally 50 farang couples and not a Thai girl in sight.

How it all started

So my story begins after several holidays as a single man to Thailand. I fell in love with the country, the culture, the weather, the food, the history, the beaches, nightlife and of course the women. From a young age I had always found Asian women attractive, this is of course a matter of taste I know, some men like tall white blondes, some like brunettes, I happen to like Asian women! I won’t go into details about why I prefer Thai women as Redcat covers that here. Travelling through Thailand as a single man was a great experience and I felt in heaven because meeting beautiful Asian girls back home in England wasn’t exactly easy.

A quick side note: Now I have discussed this at great length with some of my friends here in Thailand. I have been maligned for my love of Thai women by a couple of co-workers who are “happily” married to western women. They tell me they do not find Thai women attractive and often talk about the amount of “rough girls” in certain establishments around Bangkok when we visit them. As I just said it is a question of taste but myself and my friends have come to the conclusion that they are even in denial or just have never experienced a Thai girl in bed. So before you leave for Thailand you might tell yourself you don’t find Thai women attractive but trust me once you have had a taste you will get the fever just like I did.

Now you might be thinking the only reason I came out here was for the women when actually that is far from the truth, one of the main reasons was my love of Thailand’s national sport Muay Thai. Not only do I love to watch the sport but I also train in the art and did so for several years back in the UK. Obviously many of my friends at my gym in the UK were naturally jealous of me leaving the group to “live the dream” in Thailand and my last session was when I first realised maybe it would be a mistake to move here with my ex.

As I was leaving my last Muay Thai session in the UK, one of the instructors wished me good luck for my new life in the land of smiles and he then asked me “are you taking your girlfriend?” I replied, “yes, of course” he simply said “bad idea”. At the time I felt things would be ok even though I had travelled in Thailand before and was fully aware of the charms of this beautiful country but visiting and living here are two different beasts. Never the less the seed of doubt was planted.

Even though we both felt it would be a good idea, my girlfriend was fully aware that I found Asian women attractive. We had a comfortable jovial relationship in the UK, she was relaxed, confident and would often joke about other people we find attractive. So just like I was fully aware she fancied all of the Kings of Leon she also knew I found Asian women attractive because I told her such. In the UK this obviously didn’t concern her but then as you can imagine it very quickly became a problem for her when we were living together in Bangkok. This then lead to accusations and paranoid behavior, I will get to this later in the story.

We arrived last year in August full of high hopes and excitement for our new life together in Thailand. We had rented a condo for one month and on site there were some bars and restaurants so when we arrived we went for some food. By the time the girl had taken our order I realized I had made a mistake. The ex said innocently “wow she is a pretty girl!” I’m thinking yeah you don’t say…

Now what didn’t also help was that I decided to stop smoking when we arrived in Thailand, after over 10 years of smoking I decided to go cold turkey. So our first 2 weeks settling into Bangkok didn’t go well as we had some blazing arguments even when visiting the beautiful island of Koh Samet. All the time thinking “did I made a mistake?” I told myself at the time that this doubt was a product of my nicotine withdrawal and things would get better.

Move to Thailand with farang girlfriendWe found a new condo and over the course of the next 3 months I didn’t go out much, we spent time together in our condo but I did get some part time work at a language school. One day I was waiting for the students when this stunning white skinned Thai girl walks in. She was my only student and I was trying to keep a lid on how attractive I felt she was. She had booked a short one-month course to brush up on her English before she became an airhostess. At the end of the class her friend who worked there asked me straight up do you think she is pretty and do I have a girlfriend, talk about being put on the spot!

My ex-girl friend and myself worked different hours so I often found myself alone in the condo so I would read up on life in Thailand on sites like this. This only served to wet my appetite for what I could be getting up to as a single guy in Bangkok and around Thailand. So if you do decide to move to the Kingdom with your farang girlfriend then do not read any sites like Thailand Redcat, as it will only serve to make your life even worse!

So after 3 months I left the part time job at the language school and got a job at an international institute. I was working with many expats from my home country and my social life exploded, now all of a sudden I was getting invitations for nights out but as you can imagine bringing my girlfriend along wasn’t really the vibe, which posed a problem for me. I couldn’t count the amount of times we had an argument when I arrived back from a night out. I made many new friends and this leads me onto the next problem a farang girl might have living in Bangkok: Making new friends.

Problems for Farang Women in Thailand

It is difficult for western girls to make friends in Thailand. I am drawing from my personal experience and anecdotal evidence from friends and Thai girls. My friend’s Thai wife said to me after she met us, your girlfriend will find it difficult to make friends and she was right because she made maybe one or two friends. I am sure there are exceptions to the rule but I think this is a serious problem for farang girls. There could be many reasons for this but I think what it boils down to is losing confidence and self esteem, even the most average Thai girl is more beautiful in comparison plus if she is working with all farang males or Thai staff who don’t speak decent English then where else can she go to make friends?

You Farang girlfriend will almost certainly lose her self esteem, become less confident and generally suspicious of your behavior. In my case she was a very relaxed confident girl back in the UK but this almost completely changed within three months of living in Thailand and she began to get suspicious and one two occasions she went behind my back to check my phone, one time finding a conversation with a good friend back home talking about how I wished I was single all the time and it would be over soon and bragging about having fun on Cowboy.

So the rest of our time together fell into a pretty tedious routine. Work, boring night in, thinking of excuses why I didn’t want sex, the weekly fuck to keep her happy (which was more like climbing a mountain), drinking with my friends, missing out on night outs with single friends because I didn’t want the fall out back at home, moaning to my single friends about being stuck in a relationship, questions about why I am late home, accusations and arguments. It was feeling more kin to a jail sentence and I was too much of a coward to end it.

Time to Break Up

That is my story and you probably thinking what tip have you got for breaking up with your farang girlfriend who has followed you to Thailand. Well, this is not an easy question to answer. Ending a relationship wherever you are in the world at home or abroad is never easy but is especially difficult when you live with your western girl in a foreign country. Also there is no good time to do it either. I fell into the trap of thinking I cannot do it now because her friend is visiting her next month or I can’t do it now because we are going home for xmas. In fact I planned to do it after Christmas but then realized both of our mother’s are coming in Easter – it all goes on. The point is there is always something in the pipeline when you live abroad so just do it, it will be painful but do it. It may cost you a flight home and in my case a new Samsung TV.

After living in the Kingdom for the best part of 18 months I see little reason why farang girls would want to live here for long term. I suppose if you are a very attractive confident western girl you might be able to get on but for the average English girl who is super confident living in England, she cannot survive over here long term because comparing herself to even the most average looking Thai girl will make her feel insufficient and she will never be able to compete with Thai girls for farang men, unless of course they find Thai men attractive then they might find it easier to find a man over here.

So I hope my story will help to inform people who think about moving to Thailand with their farang girlfriend and also inspire some unhappy men to do the right thing and end their relationship. A few points to remember when living in Thailand with an average western girl:

  • To both of you, even the most average Thai girls will look like super models.
  • You will have to make up crazy excuses as to why you have no sex drive.
  • Your Farang Girlfriend will think it’s something wrong with her.
  • Walking around in one of the countless of huge shopping malls in Bangkok you won’t be able to concentrate as you will be distracted by what seems to be an unlimited amount of beautiful Thai women.
  • You will meet girls and wish you were single.
  • You will end up frequenting certain famous districts within Bangkok and Pattaya so to inflict even more torture upon yourself (unless of course you are a naughty boy but then you have to live with the guilt)
  • You will start to look at your girl friend in the way you might look at either a car crash or a dead animal.
  • Sex will be more like climbing a mountain rather than having sex with your loved one.
  • She will get very jealous of your new social life which then leads to suspicious behavior, paranoia, accusations and of course many arguments!
  • She will change almost over night – in my case she was a confident relaxed girl but changed into a suspicious paranoid non-confident bitter farang girl.
  • You will get jealous of your single friends or either your friends with beautiful Thai girlfriends or giks.

Now by no means is my story a “one size fits all approach” and like I said earlier in the article there are many exceptions plus I am sure many western couples have a fantastic relationship in Thailand. I just wanted to share my experience and offer advice for anyone else who finds themselves in the situation I was in. I welcome any feedback, comments and other similar experiences. Thanks for reading guys and good luck!

About Redcat

Redcat

Redcat lives his dream by living and traveling in Thailand. On Thailand Redcat he shares his experiences and advice to all aspects of (night)life in Thailand. Redcat is also fluent in Thai both spoken and written and is author of the books Thai Beginner’s Course and Thai Love Course.

39 Responses

  • Ladette says:

    I hope my previous comment won’t be misunderstood as a crude libertine propaganda, haha! What I was trying to say is – moving a partner to a foreign country affects some really important coeffients that have been maintaining the relationship in a status quo. A couple shouldn’t really leave their hometown together with the awareness that the nature of their relationship might change. The friendship, bond, and common cultural values between a couple is a powerful emotional support for any farang far away from farangland, and don’t have to be traded off with sexual gratification, experimentations, whatever. Your Thai girlfriend provides whatever your farang girl can’t, as your girl’s side boy takes her on adventures you can’t. You two will grow out of Thailand, head to the next country on your list, and start a new chapter. Or, one of you will leave the other – which could happen even if you had not left home country.

  • Ladette says:

    Another option is to open the relationship. Monogamy can be challenging in any part of the world. It’s not like farang girls won’t entertain the idea of dating modern, third-culture Thai men or meeting other farangs through expat gathering events and the like. Most Asian men I’ve met are polite, funny, and likable; and interesting, decent-looking farang gentlemen pass through Bangkok all the time. Surely I can’t be the only one who…? ;)

  • sa says:

    You are perfect. Actually, your website is the best .Good luck and God bless you.

  • Hugo says:

    I would have agreed with the author 100% in 2006, but in 2016 it’s not so sure. Thai women are getting fatter almost by the day. The times of abundant attractive women are passing very fast, and will be gone at this rate by 2021.

    • Lynn says:

      Usually loser, more abusive, white guys hook up with Asian women because the higher quality Caucasion women have upscale husbands and boyfriends. I have a great job, huge green eyes, long 5 foot 8 legs, and a size DD rack….my husband is an orthopedic surgeon…….
      Id like to see an Thai girl stand out next to me in a crowd lol!!
      Oh btw the Asaian culture is becoming one the most obese….

      • Gin says:

        You also sound very high fucking maintenance. I can walk into a joint in thailand, speak a few words to a cute thai girl and 90% of the time have some good fun.

        Huge green eyes, wow, amazing, you know other colors work too? DD breasts, too fucking big, they’l be at your ankles in 10 years.

        Enjoy your husband I don’t give a shit, let me enjoy the lovely thai women, your post is the epitome of western womens superiority complex.

  • Bruce Willis says:

    I spent 3 years in Thailand as an English teacher. I would never be able to bring my ex-wife to Thailand. My ex, was super jealous, and I did nothing but work and go home.
    Going to Thailand was a breath of fresh air. At first, I made a mistake and met a Thai woman in a bar who was not that attractive, and really thought of me as a cash machine.
    However, my life changed when I went to the second town I worked, looking for accommodation.
    I was waiting in Pizza Company across the street while my Honda motorcycle got an oil change.
    The manager was glorious beautiful, and could not stop myself from giving her my phone number.
    2 weeks later I get this text mail, asking me when I am coming into town. I had totally forgot about that amazing woman in the pizza place. I thought it was my school, texting me, to help me find a place to live. After 5 texts on my phone, I became frustrated about her asking me when I was going to arrive in town. She did not talk to me. I could not believe it, this amazing girl wanted to hook up with me at the hotel, in her town.
    It was all history when I arrived at the hotel. She did everything for me, but cook. She was my friend, guide, and girlfriend. She did more for me, than my ex-wife did in 6 years of marriage.
    Anyone, who says bad things about the average Thai girlfriend really does not know women.
    Thailand is full of good, funny, intelligent Thai women who just want a man to love them.
    Sorry, but if I were in Canada, I would have to have lots of money or be a medical doctor or lawyer, to meet this kind of woman in Canada. Plus, here, they are mostly Muslim or Indian who really hate Caucasian men. Its like living in big refugee Prison.

  • CJS says:

    Let’s say if you go there with a farang women who is open minded into threesomes with other women and even open to having a side girlfriend. That would be my case. From what I understood Thai women are open to that sort of thing, or?

    • Ladette says:

      Yes, I just wrote a similar comment… A rigid belief in monogamy shouldn’t complicate things.

      Just open the relationship and let your gf date and romp anyone without you. Not all women lack self-esteem or have zero lust in sexual adventures. Not all Thai men are afraid of farang ladies – there are plenty who have lived overseas and are very open-minded. There are dating sites, expat gatherings, friend of a friend passing through, etc – don’t worry about her.

      ‘From what I understood Thai women are open to that sort of thing, or?’ -> BIsexual women would be open to that. I made the mistake of letting a straight woman join us and I had to pretend to be excited because she was so self-conscious – cringe! If you invite a straight woman to join you and your gf, they should be able to pleasure each other, you don’t have four hands and superhuman coordination. Let your girl have a ‘date’ with the other girl s that they can build a connection prior to the main event.

      Or, get her invite another male or let her find her own sideboys. These are possible without ruining your relationship. If you and your farang girl have the confidence to move to Asia together, there’s likely an indestructible soulmate connection between the two of you, isn’t there.

  • Hannah says:

    I am a European -looking woman living and working in Thailand. Originally from Russia. I have not much to tell on the subject of decent Thai girls, as I usually communicate in my own circle (foreigners) and most Thai women I see work on the streets, so guess who they are.. But I have something to say about the looks of those “beautiful ladies”. Well, there certainly are nice and pretty Thai women, but there are also fat, disfigured and clumsy once. And toooo short to boot. I am 5.8 feet tall, have a slender and feminine figure and never once for 8 months have I felt inferior or less attractive than the Thai women. Quite the contrary: very frequently a Thai woman will approach me only to praise my looks and to express her envy. Overall: I find the article very amusing.

  • Stratier says:

    The point is: if you really had been in love, no supermodel (Thai or otherwise) would have come between you. You were in a relationship for all the wrong reasons. Take it from a life long bachelor… :-)

  • Lobber says:

    Im thinking of taking a trip to Thailand in Sept, thought I would stay about a month. I have joined a couple of sites, the ladies look incredible, at age 36-43, many look 25-30, do you think the pics are real? I posted a pic of myself, seem to get hits, and those I’ve showed interest mostly ping back yes. I will be 55, decent shape, not Tom Cruise looking but have had success with nice women before, especially once we spend a little time together. I don’t smoke or drink, so it’s Diet Coke at the bar, I plan on a little golf, some beach activities, relax a bit, see a little of whats over there, but really just looking to connect with a few quality ladies. Two so far are just phenomenal, one is reporter and the other works for a radio station. Both live out always from Bangkok, so I might have to travel. Question, how much money are most of these ladies looking for in their partner? I went through a bad divorce not to long ago, ex got most of the assets, I’m kinda starting over. I have decent job, 100k +, but I rent a small condo, have nice car, ect… Just not a lot of assets. What do you think, any luck in finding a good lady over there ? The reason I’m looking at Thailand, is I became friends with a nice Thai lady here in the states, I was so impressed with her, I thought I would check out what’s over there. I’m not looking to go on a sex tour, just looking to meet some nice gals, I was thinking no younger than 36 but up to 50, two so far are 39,40, they look great to me. Both asked if I had line id after a couple days of chatting on Thai friendly. Is 39-40 to young over there, for someone 55, how is it perceived? I’m not looking for 25, hell I have daughters that age. Any advice would be great, sorry being long winded. Thanks

    • Dear Lobber,

      You’ll end up with 25s year old in no time once you’re in Thailand. Just avoid getting into relationship with a bar-girl. Find and educated executive (the ones that work in government or banks, or managerial at hotels / resorts types). Then you will be allright. Good luck

    • Bruce Willis says:

      A Thai woman probably will not ask you to fill out a credit form, about your car, and condo.
      Just go to a woman you like a teacher, medical doctor, lawyer, engineer etc. Women who would not give you the time of day in US or Canada. Invite them to lunch. The worst is they will politely say no. If you are fat, its probably a negative. All farang are fat to the Thai people unless you are Captain America with a 6 pack.
      If you smile, and dress well, you will probably get the right response. I know, I was surprised. My good fortune was I was an English teacher so it gave me some respect with the community, and government. It made it easier to meet people.
      Its probably why, many retired men, volunteer to work for free, to keep busy and make some connections with the community.
      Join the Rotary Club, and you will certainly meet lots of people who will help you connect.
      Meet a good girl, with a good family. If you do, you will be happier because she will help you
      and she will not be asking you for money.
      That was my experience. My girlfriend had a car, which we used. I drove a new Honda motorcycle. It was so much fun traveling with her on that little motorcycle. However, the car was safer.
      Its making me homesick for Thailand. Do not get Thai fever, like I did and think about nothing but returning to Thailand.

  • Steve says:

    I have a Thai girlfriend and I always leave my wallet on the table. It has anything up to 30,000 baht it in at any one time. She has NEVER taken a single baht from me without asking first. I also have $6000 in my travel bag in the cupboard and it is just as safe from as my wallet. I live in a condo so don’t have to worry about hotel staff. I trust my girl 100% with money. She has never let me down in the 8 months we have lived together. She also leaves her money around and knows I would never steal it from her. She also trusts me 100% with money. Trusting me around other women is another story. She is a very jealous young lady. :)

    Please don’t think that all Thais are liars and thieves. That is very unfair. You will find liars and thieves in every country, not just Thailand.

  • Dave Addison says:

    Many years ago on holiday I cashed £600 into Thai baht was to late to put it in the hotel safe so went out with it in my back pocket, later that night bar fined a girl and told her I would be back later.
    as the bars where closing my drinking partners reminded me about my wasted bar fine up the road just as the girl came looking for me, we went back to my room and in the morning i left her in bed to go and play golf.
    when at the golf course i found i has left my money on the table in my room, on returning to my room after golf found my money gone, my drinking buddies found this very amusing till we reached the bar were i bar fined my lady friend who told me i must be stupid leaving that much money about anybody could pick it up and handed all of it back to me then complained that i didn’t leave her anything before leaving to play golf.
    So not all Thai are liars and cheats as this has been the norm for me.

  • Berny says:

    your experience has nothing to do with Thailand or Asia.
    Nothing to do with Singapore either what is a lovely country with great people.
    Had you moved to the US, Germany, Britain, Nigeria or Eastern Europe your relationship would have ended as well.
    If it is in your mind that the grass is greener on the other side of the fence and you are going out to get hungry, you’ll think Fish and Chips or Bratwurst are delicious.
    Best of luck seeking the greener pasture

  • Ken says:

    My Thai GF talked a great story on Skype before I got to Thailand but they were mostly lies.. She lied & lied over & over. She stole 20,000 dollars from me yet she said that she had her own money & did not need mine. On top of her lies she was a sociopth I learned later. She said she loved me but that was to manipulate. Her friends were much the same they gave guys sex to get money from then. In gereral Thai women don’t know love as western women do. Thai love is very hollow generally speaking. If you just want to fuck Thai women their is plenty of Thai that you csn fuck. Seems that the whole country is protituting them selves. To me it has warped values worship Buggha but fuck every guy you can get money from. Thailand is a very dirty country hot as hell filled with hundreds of gold plated Temples while people are poor Lying seems to be a virtue yet they worship Buddha. Best time for me was on my departure flight & sat with a lovely honest Japanese female..sorta restored my faith in human where Thailand chopped it up.

    • pascal yang says:

      Hello Ken, It is interesting what you wrote. I share a similar point of view with you but at the same time I believe that a whole country of 65 millions people there must be a lot of good people around. Just that we seldom meet them.
      Those people we deal with like prostitutes, bar workers etc., they are out to take what they can from you so it creates an illusion that the whole country is doing it. But on the other hand even ordinary ladies like those who work in offices or shops may also do the same thing they cheat and lie to get your money, this only strengthen your belief. Why do ordinary laldies cheat and lies , well,they are desperate for money to buy the latest branded handbag or handphone.
      But some lucky people who met honest ladies they have a different story to tell. In fact getting involved or getting married to any lady of any nationality is in itself a liability.
      Imagine if we walk along the seashore and I pick up a pebble( small stone) and say to you “get me another one that fit exactly on to this one (in terms of size, shape and colour)”. I bet you will have a hard time doing that. So this applies marriage to all nationalities.
      And with all our ego and selfishness how can we find someone who could fit our character,in other words they have to understand our character and put up with our shortcomings. That’s a lot to ask for.
      I would put good marriage at around 2 percent and those that work out with some smaller problems around 10 percent and the rest are just waiting for divorce, murder or separation.

      • Ken says:

        As I mentioned most of my GF’s friends have sex void of feelings of love & exibit no feeling of remorse instead revel in that they ar. getting money from a farang.
        My GF even schools them to go to Pia a resort town where she tells them there are many farangs.
        As for my girlfriend it was a hard pill to swallow when I admitted to myself the many lies that she told me then lied to get out of her lies.Even when I presented her with proof that she lied she woud blame someone else. Although she was pretty had lovley soft skin she was scum & ripped my heart out.She keeps sending me messages but I do not respond. Be careful in Thailand & lock up your money & heart. By the way I have had love & better sex in NA.
        Never in my years of relationships with western women have I been lied to nor had money taken from.
        PS. I never went to bars nor associated with bar girls. She came recommended by her GF as honest a good woman etc. I was so naive & stupid based on the good encounters wth NA women. Most Thais lie it is thought to be acceptable sort of a virtue.

      • Like i give you a fuck says:

        Hello Ken,

        Bar girls are veryyyy different than Thai executive girls…

        Know the differentiation.. there is a saying on the streets of Asia : Girls are two types in Asia.. one you have fun with and the other you take home to your parents. This old adage holds true..

        Good luck Ken

  • Johnny Kay says:

    And my ex wife did not look at me as the ATM? At least I will now get something back for my investment.

  • Pamela Lee says:

    Interesting article……I am a an Asian woman from Singapore, and I am sure what I have to say won’t even prick the huge bubble in which you seem to live in- but i will say it anyway :) the Thai women whom you put on a pedestal only see white men as their ATM machines, nothing more. They don’t even understand you blokes half the time. But if that pleases you, then I guess you have “settled” afterall. But I wouldn’t feel too sorry for your farang girlfriend – she is probably back in the UK shagging a beautiful black man- I heard the white girls can’t get enough of them. I wonder why… Hmmm… not so nice to be stereotyped now is it?
    You sound really immature and ignorant, and I hope you do find a nice Thai girl who won’t take advantage of that. Otherwise, you will just end up as one of the many sad old white lechers with pot-bellies in Patpong bars, slobbering over hookers, and who everyone looks at with utter disgust.

    • Simon says:

      I am sad you are one of those ugly fat asian girls that nobody looks at :(

    • Another John Doe says:

      You dumb bitch just don’t get it. We know they think of us as their ATM, and we think of them as our penis receptacles. It’s a business relationship, mutually beneficial. We get to fuck them, no strings attached, have a good time and then move on to another beautiful woman. What’s wrong with that? Everyone wins except you intolerant prudes. And variety is the spice of life.

    • H says:

      Well, hi Pamela Lee. I am thai woman. Graduated from Law school, working in an digital agency field and own a digital agency as well. My functions when it comes to work is, a strategist, a creative and a client service. For my personal life, am dating a westerner neurologist who is also a professor and have a Ph.D. degree.

      I’m bragging about all of the above profile in order to say that. According to my profile and as long as I have known myself so far. I HAD never ever got fucked up with my boyfriend’s money or even the guys who ran after me (which am certainly sure, those numbers is way far much more than you have for your whole life)

      With my mentioning profile above, I am sure I am not that type of woman who see the western guys as a mobile ATM. Saying that “the Thai women whom you put on a pedestal only see white men as their ATM machines, nothing more” is something I found not very smart at all, beside of that, it PORTRAYED your own perception and personality as a qualified “IQ and EQ” person. To make it fair, I would have said that “the Singaporean women whom come from a well establish country has neither charming nor attractive to ALL the guys across the world.” Since I have never ever heard any guy prefer to date a SG women, before.

      Sorry girl, I know it’s hard to be a SG girl who happened to be well known for ‘not looking good, selfish, no charm with bad taste’ while the number of women nowadays is outnumbering the men. So, it’s harder to be dated over than winning a lotto. While you may say you don’t care to be SINGLE but deep down inside your heart, you are always looking for a guy who will proposed you for a marriage. But with all this kind of your opinion, it might be a bit hard to be dated or in a relationship. Keep trying girl!! But don’t set too high expectations!

      Also, if you are already dating someone, please help say ‘sorry’ to that guy to have known a woman like you.

      “A foolish woman keeps talking. A wise woman understands the power of her words, as well as her silence”

      In this case, I’m allow myself to be a foolish woman in order to call for my Thai women’s dignity. What about you?

    • Koen Van Dar Tel says:

      … Lovely sarcasm + you hit several nails one the head. Well done!

    • This man wants a slave, not a girlfriend (I am also a man) says:

      Pamela, happy to read some common sense. As you could expect, it was useless, but at least you tried.

      Only thing I don’t agree is that Thai women in general are like that: I am sure there are a lot of not “only looking for money” type. I also work and live here with my farang girlfriend and I am pretty happy.

      It depends on the kind of relationship you look for: if you want a slave that only takes care of you I guess you can get a better deal here. But if you want someone to share your life with then it is different. I would find difficult to be in a meaningful relationship with someone who can’t speak my language (neither I can speak hers) but it looks that is an advantage for a lot of guys.

      At the same time I don’t want to say all Thai girls are like that: I know some people here and are amazing. I think people like you (I mean the author) is not interested in them.

      When you read the comments that guys like this are doing about Thai girls you get the (sad) idea they only look for pleasant dogs: “ey, look, I have a hot girlfriend who does not bother me and let me watch football and fuck other girls! YAY!”

  • thibault says:

    captain obvious.
    seriously, i dont see any reason to enter a relation ship anywhere in the world, and you just described the worst situation possible. young people are braniwashed inbto thinking obnoxious women are good for them.
    well, i dont want to enter the debate that wome nof english descent are fat compared to even other european women, , but… they are fat.
    boy, UK have the worst divorce laws , only for that you should not marry. sometimes i think i avoided a bullet by “being a single loser”. single at 30 you re a loser, but at 40? when all your friends are divorced, well, you dnt have alimony.
    the pat that make me cringe is “our mothers are inblund for easter”. so true, remember how i have a hard time telling my family to stop bothering me and forcing me to do all kind of irrelevant shit…and i m not even married. why would i, i have a grandmother , a mother, a sister. i know what women are really like. and i certainly dont want to be involved. less i hear their BS better i am.
    about comments:
    lol for the nam vet, how do you want thai to care at all? you banged their grandmother back then in the R and R, aths all there is to know.
    i hope the quantum physics theory is a joke. ovbiously, it should. the better talking i had with girls were always about makeup, fart jokes and other useless chit chat. thats he most intelletual i want to be with wome, and thats like that it worls the better. i cant see them understand their right from their left, knowing that 100 is 10×10 (speaking about so called “college educated women ” here), so why speaking to them?

  • pascal yang says:

    It’s simple, no need to take a whole page to explain. All men want to screw a nice new chick every week if he could do that, especially if the chick has nice slim waist and her lips with the gloss reminds you of the vulva (well, unconsciously, it hijacks your hormone though). It’s all natural my friends. Just leave your women behind if you don’t want problems isn’t that simple enough to understand. You don’t want Sigmund Freud to explain that do you? If you can keep this to yourself farang men, thai ladies aren’t good in bed. Well, from my own experience. Just no good though the face and body looks good. And the bloody language barrier, so intellectual like me find it boring when conversation is limited. I would like to discuss the latest quantum physics theory.

    • Patrick says:

      JESUS CHRIST, you don’t want much do you? Good luck in your search for a female with her Doctorate in anything even approaching quantum physics that would look anything like something you would want to sleep with. Talk physics with a co-workers and make love to your lovers. Damn…

  • Phil says:

    The only way to enjoy having a farang GF in Thailand is if she swings both ways. My GF says shes game so we’ll see in July.

  • Joe says:

    Thailand needs to levy an import tax (similar to importing your sports car) to prevent stupid farangs from making the mistake of bringing their gf’s over here – a worrying trend especially among younger expats.

  • Stephen says:

    Hi Patrick, thanks for taking the time to read my article. I just want to echo the points Redcat is making, I cannot count the amount of times I have seen a moody farang guy being dragged around his farang gf, its a pretty common site. In terms of being a veteran of the Vietnam war I wouldn’t worry too much about it, from my experience Thais are pretty insular when it comes to world affairs/history even when it comes to pretty local history in SE Asia. Many I have spoken to know little or nothing about the Vietnam war or for example the attrocities that happened in Cambodia. So I really doubt that anyone would even know about it let alone care, so I wouldn’t worry about hiding the truth.

    • Patrick says:

      Thank you, that is a huge relief. As I said, I rarely speak of Vietnam unless, as is the case with most of us, I’ve been drinking. Even then I have to know the person I’m talking to pretty well. Thanks much for putting an old soldiers fears to rest. LOL.

  • Patrick says:

    Thanks for the article, I enjoyed it as I do all of them. But this one I would take as a no-brainer. If a man is the least bit attracted to Asian women (and even if he isn’t … yet) he needs to gently but firmly leave the baggage behind. As soon as I get my last two kids raised I’m selling the farm and moving to Thailand or the PI. Leaning heavily towards Thailand though.

    I do have an off topic question that you will probably never address otherwise…I am a veteran of the Vietnam war. I seldom talk about it but do you know how veterans are perceived in Thailand should it ever come up in conversation? Or is this something that I should keep forever buried. Perhaps a topic for an article.

    • Redcat says:

      Hi Patrick, as mentioned the article was written by my friend and I think it’s a great topic, you see it all the time when foreign couples are walking around town and the guy wishing he was single when looking at all those hot chicks. I honestly don’t think you get nearly as much respect for being a veteran here than in your home country; Thai people just aren’t too sensitive about these things but generally treat older people with respect.

  • RC says:

    Thank you for taking the time to write this invaluable article and could save a lot of guys some pain.

    I got the yellow fever back in 1990, and never looked back to farangland, so I did not have to deal with the prison sentence but I have seen many of the train wrecks and the emotional roadkill when a guy decides to bring his gf or wife over to Asia.

    I have mostly experienced guys being transferred from the States to Japan or the Phils. And of the relationships I knew, all ended ugly within a long protracted period of hell.

    If you doubt this would happen, I suggest you take a solo trip first, and just see if those sweet lil’ things do anything for you.

    And if so, then you know the road you need to take.


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